Narnia's Just Queen
by violad3r
Summary: When Edmund is captured by the Telmarines, after the night raid, he receives help from Miraz' rebellious daughter Analise. Will she go against her father and flee with Edmund, or will she betray him? Edmund/OC
1. Chapter 1

It was morning when I heard the first scream. To be honest, I had never heard anything like it. It made the blood in my veins freeze and I stopped dead in my tracks.

Just to clear things up, usually we don't have people screaming randomly in our castle. We're actually a very calm royal family. My father is the King of Telmar and so I'm pretty sure he's seen more than I have, but generally we don't have a lot of drama around the house. Sometimes the cooks make something that my father doesn't like and then it might get a little messy, but nothing serious _actually_ ever happens. So naturally, when I heard the screams I was first of all, very scared and second of all, very confused.

A door behind me opened, giving me a scare. I turned to see my mother. She looked torn up and like she hadn't gotten a single hour of sleep last night.

"Analise?"

"What's going on?"

She walked towards me with a brisk pace and placed a stern hand on my shoulder, guiding me back to my room. "Nothing that concerns you."

"But I heard –"

"Don't question it, Analise, for your own sake."

"I –"

"No."

I didn't try again, but my mind was buzzing. My mother gave a light push back into my room and closed the door quickly. I stared at the golden artwork that had been painted on my white door and traced my fingers across the 'A', that my father had once carved here. It was a beautiful day out, but there wasn't much for me to do.

I had never left the castle's grounds and since I had explored every last corner of our huge gardens, curiosity won over. I quickly got dressed in my favourite blue dress. It was my favourite, since it was incredibly comfortable and I could run and jump and all that in it. I slipped out of my chambers and tip toed back down the hallway.

The person had stopped screaming, but as I pushed my ear to the door where my mother had come out I could hear groaning. My father was speaking, but I couldn't make out the words – it was just like a constant hum.

Should I go in? Pretend that I had forgotten that I should stay in my room? My mother would be furious, but at least then something would be happening. Letting my hands push down on the door handle slowly, I pushed the door open. At the sight of the room, I let out a gasp and threw my hands over my mouth.

On the ground lay a boy and from what I could see of his face and physique, he wasn't much older than me. His shirt was ripped open, revealing some nasty cuts and his face was bruised.

My father had his back facing me when I entered, but at the sound of my reaction he turned.

"Get out, Analise!"

"What are you _doing?_ " I ran to kneel by the boy. What could someone so young have done to deserve this?

My father glanced at the boy, like it was merely an inconvenience.

"Come," he took my hand, but I pulled away, still staring at the boys cuts. They looked deep.

"Someone has to disinfect these. And put on bandages," I went into overprotective mode, which was something I always did when someone was hurt. I my have never been outside the castle's boundaries, but that didn't mean that I hadn't educated myself on almost every single topic, including medical things. When you know how to help someone, there's absolutely no reason not to help – right?

"Analise, stop. I'll have a doctor look at him, I need to you to come with me," my father grabbed my hand and pulled me up. "Now."

"Let go!" I wasn't quite ready to hold his hand, not before he had given me a great explanation. It was obviously his work, I noticed that his dagger was lying on the ground and I noticed the blood.

Still, I followed him out of the room, glancing back at the boy who still hadn't stirred.

As soon as we were out of the room, I exploded. "What was that? Why on earth were you hurting him like that? That is unacceptable! You were _torturing_ him. That is inhumane!"

"Analise, please calm down."

"Calm down? You want me to…? What is _wrong_ with you?"

He smacked me across the face, making me shut up. I stared up at him, anger rising.

"Let me explain."

"There is _nothing_ you can say, that makes torturing a… 16, 17 year old acceptable."

"Yes, there is."

"No, there's –"

"Ana!"

I stopped talking, not because I wanted to, but because I knew it wouldn't do me any good to not let him talk.

"He is the enemy."

I scoffed. "He's my age!"

"Come with me."

I followed him down the corridor and into our library. Our library was where I spent most of my time. We had unlimited books – I had lived here 15 years and still hadn't even read one fourth. My father sat down in the huge leather armchair, where I usually sat. From there, you could see all the way to the ocean and even though it was an amazing view, it always filled me with longing.

'One day, Analise, one day you can leave, but only when we know there is no danger out there'. Sometimes that sentence was my only comfort, something my mother had told me when I was younger.

"I don't want you speak, communicate or even go near that boy, do you understand me?"

"Will he be taken care of?" I stuck out my upper lip and crossed my arms, indicating that I wasn't in the mood for negotiating.

"No."

"Then I do not accept your offer."

"It was not an offer, it was an order."

I shook my head.

"An, he comes from a dangerous place and from dangerous people. He is very capable of hurting you, me, anyone. We need him to find out where the others are, so that we can… discuss with them about the future of our country."

" _Discuss?_ "

He didn't answer that.

"So you're torturing someone not even half your age, to give you information?"

"We are not torturing, we gave him a choice. Sadly, he chose the hard way."

"Can you please listen to yourself?"

"Analise, go to your room."

I glared at him. " _Fine._ "

I stomped out of the library, enraged. At least I hadn't agreed to his offer… order, whatever. I was the only princess I knew of, who actually stood up to her parents – it was pathetic. Nothing was more annoying than watching a young girl do everything her father told her to do. " _Sure, papa, I'll just let the boy bleed to death."_ Not going to happen.


	2. Chapter 2

_Peter_

"Peter!"

Lucy ran up to me. She was pale and looked more worried than ever, which was understandable. The soldiers had left Aslan's How in high spirits and come back, not only missing at least half of their men, but also looking incredibly depressed.

I hugged her tightly, incredibly happy that she wasn't older and hadn't come with us. Caspian glared at me. "We could have still called if off. We had the time."

I let go of Lucy. "You're blaming _me?_ If you had just stuck to the plan and not run off to talk to your stupid uncle, everything would've gone fine!"

"If it wasn't for you all those soldiers would still be alive," he was breathing heavily. "I was against it from the start. We should have stayed _here,_ like I said!"

"Oh, you -!"

" _Stop!"_

Susan came stomping up to us from behind. She looked distressed. "What are you two thinking? Yelling at each other is not going to help the situation."

Caspian shook his head. I turned away.

"Peter?" Lucy was scanning every face of the soldiers that had made it back. She squeezed my arm tightly. "Peter, where's Edmund?"

"I'm sure he's…"

I looked around me and felt myself go more and more frantic by the second. I tried to think back to when I had seen him last. I remember him hitting one of the Telmarines, when he slid down the roof and then I had called his name and a warning. He had hurried into one of the guard towers, but I was sure that he had made it out. Had I really not checked to see if he was with me?

Panic clenched my heart. "Ed? Edmund?" I called out, even though deep down I knew it was ridiculous. He would've long come up to us and given one of his structured reports, and then a snarky opinion on how he would've done it differently.

I felt all the energy drain out of me and I had to sit down. "He's not here," I whispered. "He's not here."

Lucy stared at me, eyes wide, her upper lip quivering. "You mean, he's…?"

I didn't answer. Susan sat down next to me, completely in chock. Every time one of us had been hurt, injured or almost killed – we'd always made it through, and now? It was the strangest thing to think about. Could he still be alive? Would I really have to live my entire life, even back in Finchley, without my little brother?

I felt a sadness so deep, that I couldn't cry. So I just held my sisters, until their sobs were hitched breaths and blamed myself over and over again.

"He could still be alive."

We were sitting around the stone table. Lucy was wrapped in blankets, even though it was hot out. Susan was playing around with her arrows, still looking completely crushed.

I looked up at Caspian, who had just entered the room.

"I wouldn't lose hope. It would make perfect sense for Miraz to take Edmund as a prisoner, to find out where everyone else is."

"So he'll be tortured," Lucy said quietly.

"It's either that, or they just kill him," Caspian said. I sent him a look, telling him to shut up.

"I say we attack again."

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard," I commented.

" _But,_ only me, you and Susan."

I shook my head. "We're not risking _any_ more lives."

Susan looked at me. "So you're just going to sit around and wait?"

"No, I say we make a better plan. But we have to move quickly. Caspian, do you know anyone who is remotely trustworthy in that entire castle? Someone you could send a message to, to help Edmund?"

Caspian though about it for a second, before replying. "No. They're all too scared to go against Miraz – the ones who have are long dead."

"There's not a _single_ good person in the castle?" Susan asked. "How did you manage to live there?"

"It wasn't always like that."

"Well," I interrupted. "Then we have to find someone."

Susan lifted her eyebrows. "You just want to go in there and ask around 'Hey, is there anyone nice living here?'?"

" _No,_ I'm going to spy on them."

"That plan is even worse than mine," Caspian said.

"Probably. But no one is risking their life."

"You can't decide if I want to risk my life for my little brother," Susan said. "That's completely my decision."

"No, it's not."

"Peter, yes. It is."

I shook my head. "I'm not losing two of you."

"Who said we were going to lose Edmund?" Lucy asked quietly.

"No one, said that, Lu," Susan glared at me. "Go get some sleep."

Lucy scoffed, but she still walked out, leaving us alone. Suddenly it seemed colder. It was like every now and again the realization, that I had left Edmund, betrayed him like he had, would dawn on me and would fill me with dread. The difference was Edmund betrayed us when he was 10. I did so when I was 16. Back then I had been mad at Edmund, despite him only being so young and now his betrayal didn't feel like anything important.

"I need some fresh air," I said and walked briskly into the corridor that led outside. Outside I placed my hands on the stone wall and leaned my hot forehead against the cold rock. What was wrong with me? There was no time to make a plan.

I glanced around me, pleased to see that there was no one here. Then I jogged up to my horse, swung myself on and with a small nudge of my foot, we set off galloping towards the woods. If I had looked back, I would've seen a small figure, watching me. Then that figure would've jumped onto the nearest horse and cantered after me.

Oh, if I had only seen her, I would've stopped, because losing both my younger siblings was the thing I was trying to avoid the most.


	3. Chapter 3

_Edmund_

Every morning waking up was the worst part. They gave me medication to sleep, but it was more of a disadvantage, because I then would wake up even more aching than the day before. I had tried to push the needle away the two times it had been stuck in my neck, but every time they just had to pin my arms behind my back and it was done. It was incredibly frustrating to be so helpless all the time, especially now that I had injuries.

Much of what had happened was a blur to me. I knew that they wanted to know where the Narnians were, but I would much rather die than betray them again. I wondered if my siblings were trying to save me, but I doubted it. They probably thought I was dead. There was little hope anyway, since I could feel that Miraz was getting more and more frustrated and eventually even the guards would get bored with me. I also knew that I got bread and water twice a day, not nearly enough to keep my stomach from growling.

"Rise and shine!"

The cell doors were opened. I lifted my heavy eyelids and glared at the guard through my eyelashes. It wasn't much, but it was the little things that I did still have the strength to do that helped me not to go insane. He walked over and kicked my foot. I groaned, but quickly the pain subsided back into the throbbing I was used to.

Then he was behind me, untying my wrists. I wasn't surprised to see a deep cut where the rope had been, but it was the least of my worries. He pulled me up by my clothes. Everyday I got a new set of clothes – ironically they were always very regal and expensive looking, only to be splattered with blood a couple of hours later.

The guard pushed me along and I limped towards the exit.

"Our king has something special planned for you today."

I made some muffled noises, but couldn't speak clearly because of the piece of cloth covering my mouth. The guard ripped it off. "What'd you say?"

"Miraz isn't a king. He's a coward."

I expected him to hit me, but instead he just scowled. "You're dumber than I thought you would be. Now walk."

I didn't object. The light that came from outside, when the guard pushed the door open, was blinding. I held a hand in front of my eyes, but quickly got used to it. The castle hallways seemed empty.

I thought I knew which way we were going, since it all occurred in the same room every day, but strangely the guard turned a different corner and knocked on a door I had never seen before.

"Where are we going?"

The man snickered. "Hungry?"

The doors were opened, revealing Miraz… sitting around a gigantic table, filled with foods and drinks. All heads turned my way, including Miraz' wife and the girl, who had tried to help me the first day I was here. She was very beautiful, but I scolded myself for even thinking that. Or maybe I should just take it as something positive – if I still had the energy to think about girls, that probably meant that I was still kind of human.

Miraz' wife put down her cutlery, stunned. "What is this?"

"I thought Edmund could join us for lunch today," Miraz smiled. "What do _you_ think, Analise?"

"Yes. I mean, there's no reason for him not to join us, _is there,_ father?" she took a bite of her bacon and stared at her father.

He smiled. "Of course not. Sit, Edmund."

As I didn't move, the guard gave me a push, but luckily I caught myself before ramming into the table. Unfortunately I had to use the foot that had been injured the day before. I sucked in a breath, but wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing me squirm. At least not now. I limped forwards and took place at the table.

Analise sent me a worried look, but I ignored her. Just because she stood up a little bit to her father, didn't mean I could trust her.

They resumed eating, Miraz' wife sending her husband curious glances.

"Why don't you take some food? As a king of _Narnia,_ you must be used to having luxurious food, am I right?" Miraz was cutting a piece of steak.

"No," I replied. "We spend our money on things that help the entire country and not just us."

Miraz laughed. "How humble of you. And you are the _Just_ King, am I right?"

"Yes."

"But… weren't you the one who betrayed your family to the White Witch?" Miraz sent me a confused look, but I could see the humor in his eyes. He had this whole thing planned out and was only doing it to play with me.

"Yes."

"For… Turkish Delight? Please, correct me if I'm wrong."

"Yes."

"Well, that is not particularly _just_ or _humble_ or anything, is it?"

I clenched my jaw. "Do forgive me, but I was ten, sir. How old are you know? 40-something? And I also do believe that what you are doing is a little bit worse."

I noticed Analise staring at her father. He didn't look very amused himself anymore.

"I hope you're full, Edmund."

"To the brim."

"How nice," Miraz gestured to the guard, who came and pulled me out of my seat. I winced, but managed to hold back anything else.

The door closed behind me and immediately I heard a chair being pushed out and steps running out the door on the other side of the room.

 _Miraz_

We watched Analise run out the door. Prunaprismia turned her cold eyes on me. "What on earth were you _thinking?_ "

"I was simply trying to show Analise how cruel the boy is. He is _dangerous_ and I don't want my daughter anywhere near him."

"What has happened to you? You are completely obsessed with hurting this boy! Now your plan has backfired and who knows what Analise thinks of you!" she stood up. "You disgust me, Miraz."

Then she stomped out the door, after her daughter.

I stared after her, in rage. I would not let this Edmund tear my family apart. I would not let Analise find out about the Narnians. Three more days. Three, and then Edmund Pevensie shall be killed.


	4. Chapter 4

_Analise_

I waited until the clock struck midnight, before I slipped out of my silk covers. Dressed in my night gown and boots, I took the basket I had prepared the night before and tip toed out of my room. Before proceeding I listened intently, if anyone was coming down the hall. There was no noise coming from my parents' bedroom or from my father's study, so I hurried towards the staircase.

The further down I got in the castle, the colder it got and I praised myself for wearing my boots instead of my slippers.

I walked down the corridor, as calmly as I could, like I totally belonged here until I got to where the guard was standing. I was about to open my mouth, to start blabbering (which was part of my plan) when I realized he was asleep, leaning up against the wall, his weapon slipping from his grip.

I smirked. I could use this against him, if he did decide to wake up, but for now I took the keys hanging on the hook and making sure that they didn't make any noise, slowly unlocked the door.

"Edmund?"

I peered into the dungeon. First I didn't spot him, but then movement caught my eye, and I saw him lift his head. He was tied to a metal pole, his black hair clumped with blood and his eyes didn't have the same spark as three days prior.

He sent me a bleak smile. "Hi there."

I looked behind me. The guard was still snoring, so I grabbed one of the torches fastened to the wall and closed the door behind me slowly. The only light in the room was coming from the moon outside and all it seemed to do, was enhance the darkness of the shadows. I lifted my torch.

There was a new cut over his eyebrow, but it looked like most of the injuries weren't visible.

"What are you doing?" he asked me.

I kneeled next to him, placing the basket in front of me. "I can't just watch."

He chuckled. "No one else seems to have a problem with it."

"I haven't been brainwashed yet," I said. Saying it, I knew it was true. Telmarines had been brainwashed to hurt, maim and kill by no one else but my father. God, I had been so oblivious all these years.

I inspected his head wound closely and then poured some alcohol on a cotton pad. As I dabbed it on, he winced. "Sorry."

"'S okay," he muttered. "Analise, right? Your name?"

I was surprised he had caught that. "Yes."

"And you're Miraz' daughter?"

"Uh huh."

He didn't say anything after that.

"Any other wounds?" I asked. He lifted his eyebrows, like he was asking if I were serious. "Okay, then I need you to lift up your shirt."

I opened the chains that were binding him to the pole and he took off his shirt, without commenting. Seeing the harm that had been done, I bit my tongue not to scream in frustration. Carefully, I ran my fingers along his back, not really realizing what I was doing.

"Whip?"

"Yeah," he breathed. I registered that this must be energy consuming for him too. I remember once where I was really sick, with incredibly high fever and I was so weak, I barely had the energy to lift a cup. What he was experiencing must've been ten times worse.

I started cleaning the cuts, as gently and soothingly as possible, but it's hard when you don't have a large amount of utensils or medicinal things to use. There was one particularly deep one, which I had to sow together. All through this process he didn't complain once.

When I was finished he leaned against the pole, taking a deep breath. "Thank you."

I sent him a small smile and then packed out the food I had sneaked with me from the dinner table. He looked at it like he was in heaven, although it was only bread, an apple and a bottle of water. He picked up the apple and took a bite, grinning at me. "Heavenly."

"They give you food though, right?" I asked slowly, not really knowing if I wanted to know the answer.

"They stopped yesterday. I think your father's patience is running out."

I bit my lip, to stop tears from coming. All my life my father had been my hero, my rock and now I was finding out he was some kind of mass murderer who tortured boys my age and wanted to make a whole species instinct.

"Do you mind, telling me about the Narnians? I know it's bad timing, but… all I've heard are stories. Them being real is so… weird."

Edmund put down the core of the apple and took a swig of water, trying to find a position in which he was somewhat comfortable.

"They're great. I mean, they're all selfless and kind and every one kind of lives… lived, in harmony. It's hard to be around them sometimes though, they're all so forgiving and sweet you feel like the devil."

I smile at the thought, knowing it was a joke from his side. "Are there really centaurs?"

He nodded.

"And fauns?"

Another nod.

"And… Aslan?"

"Aslan's the king of all of us. When I say all of us, I mean _all of us,_ he has control over everything including the trees and water. He could do whatever he wanted with all Telmarines, just by winking an eyelash."

"If we have done so much harm to his people, then why doesn't he?"

"Aslan's fair. He only does things with a reason and he doesn't fight all our battles. He helped us the first war by barging in and saving the day, but he always says that things don't happen the same way twice. I think things are going to work out differently this time."

I look at the palms of my hands. "We're in a war?" I asked quietly.

"Kind of. I mean, we've only had a couple attacks. I got captured on our first night raid, but I'm sure that things have happened since I got here," he looked at me, his eyes dark. "You've really not noticed anything?"

"Just… the way people have been acting. More hectic. But my parents always lock me in my room when anything happens. I've never been out of the castle grounds."

His eyes widened. "What? _Never?_ In your… wait, how old are you?"

"15."

"God. What torture."

"Yeah, they even gave me the room with the best view."

He laughed and I smiled. Despite his wounds, he looked like he was doing okay. I just hoped that my father would let off for a bit, so that he could heal.

"We shouldn't push our luck," I glanced at the door. "I have to get back to my room."

"Can't I keep the keys? I would be able to get out."

I smiled sadly. "I don't think you would be able to. There's guards everywhere, especially since your arrival."

"How'd you get in?"

I gestured towards the guard. "He fell asleep on the job."

He didn't say anything, but I knew what he was thinking.

"I wouldn't do it. You have injuries and if they did catch you, you'd be dead."

He nodded, but didn't seem satisfied. I sat up, ready to leave.

"I could talk to my father. Ask if I could take you for walks through the castle grounds. I could make him believe that I was trying to gain your trust, so that it would be worse for you if I betrayed you. Then we could figure something out."

He looked at me. "You'd do that? I mean, your plan needs some improvements, but would you seriously help me escape?"

"Yeah. I would."

I got up to fasten his chains again, so that it wouldn't seem all too suspicious. I also took the empty bottle back in my basket, before I turned to leave.

"Hey, Analise?"

"Uh huh?"

"Thanks."

* * *

 _Peter_

It was pitch black by the time I reached the castle. There were only few lights on and no guards in sight. Still, I unsheathed my sword, just in case. Ten hundred worst possible scenarios were running through my head as I made my way around the wall to find a way up. This was absolutely ridiculous, but I was desperate and next to all those worst possible scenarios of me falling and breaking my neck, was Edmund being tortured and lying on the floor, in a pool of his own blood.

Great, Peter, you're so good at being optimistic.

I found a section of the wall that looked like it was older, because the stones weren't smooth and so there were footholds and places where I could hold on. I gripped the first stone and put my foot up on one, ready to climb up, when I heard someone rustling in the bushes behind me. I jumped down and turned around, face to face with Lucy.

" _Lucy?_ What in the name of Aslan are you doing here?"

"What in the name of Aslan are _you_ doing here? Were you about to climb up?"

"No!"

"Yes, you were."

All of our little argument was in a hushed whisper, so it was hard to take each other completely seriously.

"Okay, yes I was."

"And what exactly were you planning to do when you got over?"

"I, was…" I looked up at the castle. "I was going to improvise."

"Peter, you're the High King, you should at least have _some_ kind of a plan!"

"I did. I was going to spy, like I said."

She scrunched up her eyebrows. "In the middle of the night?"

"I…" Finally I couldn't find any other arguments and just shut up. "Maybe you're right."

She smiled at me, relieved that I had officially stopped trying to get over the wall. "Maybe we should just go home."

I gave her a hug. "No, I need to know he's okay."

"You're going in?" she looked up at me.

"I'm definitely waiting here till morning and then I'll see what happens."

Lucy bit her lip. "I'll stay with you."

I was against it, but I was also against her riding all the way home in Telmarine areas. Maybe I could send her home tomorrow, when it got light. Now that I thought about my plan, it seemed even more stupid and I squeezed Lucy's hand.

"Thanks for stopping me."

"I couldn't just watch," she smiled sadly, but I knew that her thoughts were elsewhere completely. We set up a sleeping area further in the woods, in a clump of bushes. As we were lying there, I cradled my little sister in my arms, so scared to lose her.

"Lucy?" I whispered.

"Mm?"

"We'll save him."

She hugged my arm tighter. "I know."


	5. Chapter 5

_Lucy_

"Lu?" Peter whispered. "Can you see anything?"

I peered through the tiny hole we had found in the wall, which we had been able to reach with me standing on Peter's shoulders. It had been a great find, but looking through it there really wasn't much to see.

"Just a garden," I replied.

"A garden? Like the one our grandma has?"

I sent him a sceptical look. "No, like the one the King of Telmar has."

The garden was very beautiful. Roses, peonies and hundreds of other beautiful flowers were being watered by gardeners, who were lazily walking around the perimeter. Bushes had been trimmed to perfection, some even into statues. The flowers were all in a particular order, first a bed of white flowers, then pink, then red, then purple and so on. The castle walls were covered in ivy and around the small wooden door, white flowers had also been planted. There was a small walkway of wood, that was a little higher than the ground and I noticed that none of the gardeners were walking on it, like it was forbidden.

As I was watching, the wooden door opened and a young girl stepped out. She had blonde curls that framed her face perfectly. She would've looked petite and innocent, if it weren't for her incredibly dark eyes that didn't fit with the fair hair at all. Still she was incredibly beautiful and dressed regally – I knew she wasn't one of the gardeners. I must've tensed, because Peter shifted, almost making me lose my balance.

"What's happened?"

"A girl has come out of the castle."

Peter looked confused. "But Caspian told me he was the only person under 20 in the entire building."

"Apparently not. She can't be much younger than Edmund."

The door opened again and this time I gasped.

"What is it?" Peter urged.

"It's Edmund!"

I watched as two guards followed him to where the girl was standing. It hurt to see that he had been injured badly. He had a limp and his face was bruised and cut. Every step seemed to cause him pain. The tears welled up.

"I can't watch," I whispered, but I didn't ask to be put down, because that wouldn't be fair. The girl exchanged a few words with the guards and they backed a couple of metres back. Then she led Edmund towards the flowers and sat down on a bench. He sat down next to her, seemingly at ease.

"They're talking," I informed Peter.

"Can you hear anything?"

I strained my ears, but couldn't get a single sound. They were too far away. "No."

"Does he look… okay?"

I scanned my brother's face, his black hair and his dark, dark eyes. No, he didn't seem okay at all. Sure, right now he was giving some weak smiles, which he was good at, and you really did need to know him incredibly well, to see that they were fake, but I could see that he was on the verge of giving up.

"We have to get in there, Pete."

He let me down and my tears came rolling. I gasped for air in between sobs and Peter held me closely.

"Lu, I'll get in there. Have you already forgotten my promise?"

I shook my head. He wiped away my tears. "You're incredibly brave, but I need you to ride home, okay?"

"Okay."

"Tell Susan and Caspian what's going on and tell them about the girl. Ask Caspian, if he is completely sure that he has never heard of this girl before, because maybe we then know someone who could help."

I gave him another tight hug. "Don't get seen."

"Likewise."

Then I ran up to my horse and mounted it. I set off at a brisk pace, only looking back once.

* * *

 _Analise_

I could tell that something had changed from the night before. He didn't seem as smiley and joking, but suddenly a lot more introvert. Again I was the one asking the questions, but his answers were a lot shorter, often just one word. Still I kept him going, knowing that if he got too distracted he'd probably think of more negative things – that was at least how my brain worked.

"So, Peter's the High King?"

He nodded. I opened my mouth to ask another irrelevant question, when he spoke up.

"Would you really betray your country just to help me?"

His question surprised me. "Betray my country? You make it sound so much worse than it actually is."

He shrugged. "You'll be marked as a traitor, like I was."

"My father wouldn't do that."

"Because he loves you?" his eyes hardened.

"I…" I couldn't answer. Did my father love me? I knew my mother did, she told me often, every night before bed when I was little. But my father? The King of Telmar – had he ever told me that I meant anything to him?

"I'm sure he does," I muttered.

"And do you love him?"

"He's my father!"

"So…" Edmund lifted his eyebrows. "You love him."

"But that doesn't mean that I always agree with him," I argued.

"Would you rather see him dead or me?"

" _What?_ Edmund, you can't ask me to answer that."

"Why not? I won't be offended," he leaned forward. "Analise, if you help me, you're getting into something much bigger than you think. There's people dying out there and in the end your father is going to die, because, believe it or not he's the bad guy in this game. Do you _really_ want your last weeks with him to be horrible?"

"You don't trust me," I breathed.

"I trust you, because I have no other choice. Everything is up to you, because I really don't have much say in any of this. What I am trying to say is, if you want to back out, you need to back out _now._ "

"I'm not going to let you die."

"You don't even _know_ me. Can't you see why I'm a little suspicious?"

I looked at my hands, my perfect nails and fingers, the little amethyst ring on my finger. "I guess. But I don't think it's fair. All I've done is help you."

I could hear that I sounded like a little child, but all I had done was out of own free will and just because my father was 'the bad guy' I wasn't trusted. I realized that no one would ever trust me – I was only trusted and respected here, in my castle by my maids and servants. But that wasn't what I wanted.

"Life isn't fair. I'm sorry, Analise."

"I'm not backing out."

He looked at me. "Seriously?"

"I'm not backing out," I repeated.

"Okay." He took a deep breath and it sounded like he was relieved.

"Did you expect me to back out?" I asked.

"Well… yes."

"Why?" I looked at him, sincerely. "Because I am a princess? You think I'm weak?"

I felt suddenly offended. Here I was giving up so much to help someone, someone I barely even knew, because I _believed_ he was kind.

"That has nothing to do with it, Analise."

"Honestly Edmund, I should be the suspicious one here. You have nothing to lose. You could be leading me right into a trap and I would believe every little lie you tell me about my father."

He didn't reply, just looked at me with those dark, dark eyes, like he knew exactly how I felt.

"I know."

"No, you don't. You're not about to betray your entire family, are you? You know what – I do love my father. He's been there for me my entire life and no matter, _how_ many people he's killed or how much damage he has done, he still was the one who read goodnight stories to me and who educated me and made sure I had a home and food, okay?" I had gotten up. Where was all this anger coming from? I knew it wasn't fair to direct it at Edmund, but it was like he had triggered something in me, so that all the anger that I had had to supress the past years of my life welled up.

The guards took a step closer, at the sight of my facial expression and extreme hand gestures. _Stop, Analise._ I was making it so much worse, but then the tears came.

God, I felt so stupid. I was standing in my little rose garden, crying, in my little white dress and my purple, matched jewellery, with the King of Narnia looking at me in despair, pity, rage and so many other emotions. His eyes were a complete reflection of what I was feeling.

"Princess!" the guard ran up to. "What has happened? Why are you upset?"

I bit my lip in frustration. _STOP CRYING._ The other guard pulled Edmund to his feet and he groaned. _STOP. STOP._ My sobs slowly became more gradual, until it was only the occasional hitched breath and I composed myself, as well as I could, despite the complete embarrassment I was feeling.

"It has nothing to do with him," I mumbled. "I was just suddenly…"

"Overwhelmed," Edmund pitched in.

I looked at him, expecting him to be furious at me or at least something negative, but he just sent me a small, sad smile. "Overwhelmed. Thank you."

The guards looked from one to the other, until one of them decided that that was enough. "Take him back to the dungeons. I know Miraz wanted to see him again today."

My heart started beating and I locked eyes with Edmund. I still felt utterly raw and exposed, my eyes red from crying, but somehow I found a little courage. "Can we just have… ten more minutes?"

The guard turned and exchanged looks with the other. "Very well, princess. But only ten."

"Thank you."

As soon as we were alone, I shook my head. "That was…"

"Completely normal."

I shook my head again. " _No,_ it wasn't. It was totally stupid, but I just couldn't help it. I'm sorry."

We sat in silence for a minute.

"Remember when your father… teased me at the lunch the other day? When he said I had betrayed my family and that that wasn't very 'Just King' of me?"

I nodded.

"He wasn't lying, you know. I did betray my family."

"For Turkish Delight?" I asked.

"Yeah."

I almost had to smile at the thought, which wasn't a good idea, because Edmund really did look troubled. "But weren't you very young?"

"And very naïve. But for months and months after, I still couldn't deal with my actions. Every time I looked at Peter, I felt like it was happening all over again. God, that look he had given me when I came back – it was worse than anything I've ever seen.

And Lucy… she was the only one who still looked up to me in some way. All the Narnians – sure, they chanted my name and told everyone what a great king I was, but if it were between me and Peter it wouldn't have been hard for them to decide. This time… it's been different. I've had more of a say in things, been able to plan and produce more than before. I guess, Peter has only really been able to forgive me, now that 1000 years have passed and the Narnians have."

"Where did you go all those years? And how are you still alive?" I asked quietly.

"I went home," he smiled at me.

"To Spare Oom?"

"Yes. Finchley, actually."

I smiled. "Finchley."

"Time's up!" the guard said. They pulled Edmund to his feet and as I watched him walk away, I found comfort in his words. A feeling I hadn't felt in a long time. I felt connected to something true and right for the first time ever and even though I knew that Edmund wasn't going anywhere pleasant, I found it comforting to know that I would help him out of here. Or at least I would try my very best.

I stayed outside, so that I wouldn't have to hear the screams.


	6. Chapter 6

_Peter_

I waited until sunset the next day for Caspian. It was agonizing – just sitting there and watching the sun go across the sky, behind those hideous, grey towers. And inside one of them was my brother, while I was just watching and feeling utterly helpless. Twice I was incredibly close to just going in there and sacrificing myself for Edmund, but I knew that Miraz could not be trusted and would probably just end up killing us both. Even though it hurt to think of it, I wasn't even sure Edmund was still alive.

I had decided, when Lucy had left, that I wouldn't think negatively about what could be happening. Maybe Edmund was just a prisoner and just chilled in a nice room, where, sure he was chained, but he got food and water and it could be worse – right?

I felt like I was going mad, by the time I heard hooves behind me. I turned to see Caspian and Susan sliding off their horses.

"Miraz' daughter," Caspian blurted out.

"Huh?"

"That's the girl. I had completely forgotten about her, because Miraz kept her isolated, which is why I think it's weird that he is letting her hang around with Edmund."

"So… you think it's a trap?"

Caspian exchanged looks with Susan, like they'd already discussed the topic. "We're not sure. Because the girl was so alone all the time, she _could_ 've easily built up a lot of anger towards her father and _could_ easily be helping Edmund… but we're not completely sure, so I wouldn't go in there thinking she's on our side."

"I doubt it," I muttered. "Great. Lucy said, that it really looked like they were kind of having fun. I hope he's not stupid enough to trust her."

Susan sat down next to me. "Does Miraz have any other children?" she asked Caspian.

"Not that I know of. He wants a male heir, though."

"I think our only hope is to trust the girl," Susan said quietly. It wasn't much of a plan, and she knew it. "I don't think Edmund would treat her as a friend, if she weren't one."

"Okay, but we need to move fast. Miraz must be losing his temper," Caspian said.

"Great. So what, we leave a note for this girl and hope that she finds it?" I asked.

Susan shook her head. "We've already come up with some ideas, and we have concluded that I need to go in."

"Why you?"

"They have never really seen me up close. I could pretend that I were a maid, looking for work." She looked questioningly at Caspian, who nodded approvingly, but still with a hint of worry etched in his features.

"And then I could also speak with the girl, make sure we're not interfering with the devil – and then give her the note. Maybe I could even keep working there and that would give us an advantage, if we attack."

I shook my head. "Once you've delivered the message, I want you to get out of there. Please."

Susan pursed her lips, but didn't argue.

"How long would you expect us to have?" I asked.

"Two days. At most."

I nodded. This would have to work.

* * *

 _Susan_

I pounded on the door, pulling my hood up closer. My face had been smeared in a little dirt, just to hide the most noticeable features and I carried a little, grey coin purse.

A tiny window opened, revealing red eyes, that looked a little drunken. No wonder, it was five in the morning. The face was round and chubby, with small, greasy strands of blonde hair and a horrible set of teeth. "What do you want?"

"I am deeply sorry for this inconvenience, Sir, but I am looking for work. May I enter?"

He let out an exasperated sigh and looked up, like he was communicating with someone.

"I have heard that the King is looking for maids?" I asked carefully.

The man nodded. "That _is_ true. Alright, I'll let you in."

The door opened and I slipped inside. It was the second time in this castle, but somehow this time everything looked different. The first time I had been attacking and I had had an army behind me. This time, if anything went wrong, I would die.

The man was in fact overweight, wearing a once-white blouse, which was splattered in grease and other things. His pants were fastened with a thick, brown belt. Behind him, leaned against the wall, stood a shield and a sword, but it didn't look like they were used very often.

"Come along," he grunted and then waltzed off onto the courtyard. I followed quickly. There was still a layer of fog in the air and with the complete silence, the atmosphere was rather creepy. "Me name's Roger."

I had a short moment of panic, before replying: "Phyllis."

He sent me an odd look. "Phyllis? That sounds like some kind of a flower."

He laughed, but it sounded more like a dog barking.

"Now, _Phyllis,_ we obviously can't wake the King now, but he should be up in an hour or two, so I'm going to sit you down with the guards."

"Thank you, Sir."

He grunted. We came up to a little house, which seemed a little out of place. It looked like it had been fastened to the wall of the castle, right in front of a passage, leading to what I thought were the king's chambers. Roger leaned against the door and banged on it.

It opened so suddenly, that Roger almost fell into the guy who came out. At once, I didn't like him. He looked like a rat, with slick white hair, a long nose and lips, as white as paper and incredibly thin. He was wearing a black ensemble, a little more fashionable than Roger's and he had an aura of authority.

"What do we have here, Roger?"

He had composed himself and licked his lips. "Evrat, this is Phyllis. Phyllis, this is Evrat. He's our barber-surgeon, but he also guards…" he sent a careful look to Evrat. "Sometimes."

I couldn't help but think how uncomfortable it must be to be surgically operated on by this man. He looked like he would rather rip out your kidneys, than help fix them.

"What should I do with her?"

Roger licked his lips again. It must be something he did when he got nervous. "She wants to work for our king. I gotta' get back to the gate, but she could sit here with you until he wakes up."

"Very well," Evrat scanned me. "Do you have any weapons on you?"

"No, Sir."

"Run along, Roger."

Roger nodded to us both, before scurrying back to his position. Evrat grabbed me by the arm and pulled me inside. The only room I could see was an office. It was basically just a window and a huge desk, filled with paperwork. Evrat closed the door behind him, locking out the morning chill.

"Sit."

He pulled out a chair for me, but in the process he knocked over a sword and shield that had been leaning against the chair. "I apologize," he muttered and placed them back where they belonged, but I couldn't pull my eyes of the weapons. They were Edmund's. I knew for sure, because on the hilt of the sword Aslan's face had been portrayed and I knew that shield anywhere.

I cleared my throat. "That is a very beautiful sword, Sir."

Evrat, who had been pouring himself a cup of tea, looked down at it and smiled. "Oh, yes. The King has asked me to keep it for him."

"Where did the King get such weapons?" I asked. "If you don't mind my asking."

"I was told it was taken off a prisoner," Evrat shrugged and took a sip of his tea, scrunching up his face like it tasted horrible. "Uh, cold."

He sat the cup back down and looked at me, as if waiting for me to ask another question.

I poised myself on the tip of the chair, suddenly feeling uneasy. I had to make sure that Evrat didn't catch on my nervousness, so I decided to keep talking.

"A prisoner? Someone who tried to attack the castle?"

Evrat seemed genuinely pleased that he could tell someone what he knew. I understood – being alone, in this little hut, with nothing to do but paperwork and the occasional surgery or hair cut, I would be bored too.

"Oh, haven't you heard? _Narnians_ attacked some days ago!" his eyes sparkled with cruel excitement. I forced a surprised look on my face.

"Narnians? But they're extinct!"

Evrat paced to the other wall, which wasn't much pacing, since there was barely space to stretch your legs in this place. "That is what I thought – what we all thought! But the Narnians attacked and, from what I've heard, they were joined by the Kings and Queens of Old!"

I didn't answer that afraid I would sound too mocking. Making myself say something like 'But they should be long dead!' would be irrelevant, since they probably already knew that.

"I have inspected the sword and I believe that it is of one of the Kings and Queens. What a historic moment, that is." He smiled proudly. "Us Telmarines have captured, tortured and are going to execute a Royal who is over a thousand years old!"

"How… How do you know that he… or she has been tortured?" I asked. Torture – we had all expected it, but it sounded so much worse now that it really had happened.

"Sweetheart, I'm the surgeon. I own all the equipment. Besides, everyone hears the screams."

He grinned at me, as I fought to keep my tears at bay.

* * *

 _Analise_

"How did it go?"

I coughed on my water, because I wasn't expecting my father to speak to me that morning. He had seemed strangely distracted. I cleared my throat a couple of times, before taking another swig of water.

"How did what go?"

"Making friends with our little King, Analise, what do you _think_ I'm talking about?"

I scrunched up my eyebrows. "I don't know, but I do have more to my life than this… mission of yours."

He glared at me over the rim of his coffee cup. What was his problem?

"It went _fine,_ " I then said, replying to his glare with cold eyes.

"Fine? Is that all?"

I took a bite of my pancake, leisurely, like I didn't have a care in the world. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his glare harden.

"Analise, I am talking to you!"

"Miraz…" my mother interrupted, but he slammed his hand on the table.

"No! She is to answer me with respect, _I_ am your King!"

I looked at him, chocked. He had never acted this way before, had always been fair to me and my mother in some way or manner.

"More coffee, Sire?"

He turned to look at a maid, who had apparently come out of he blue with a can with steaming liquid. I caught her eyes for a second and realized that I had never seen her before, despite me knowing almost all of our staff.

Her face reminded me of someone, but she turned away quickly.

My father sat down again, rubbing his eyes. "Yes."

I had expected him to yell at her for interrupting our discussion, but he waved her off calmly, so she took her position by the door.

"Now," he mumbled. "Did he tell you anything?"

"Who?" I asked, knowing exactly who he was talking about.

"Analise –" my mother sent me a warning look, but my father just nodded.

"Edmund."

I was actually sort of surprised that he knew Edmund's name.

"Oh, him. No, we just talked."

"Did he tell you about his country?"

I shifted uncomfortably, suddenly noting that I would rather have my father know how much I was against his decision.

"A little. It sounds horrendous."

He smiled, a creepy smile. What on earth had happened to him? It was like he had become the person that everyone else saw, but me, over night? Now I could actually see before me a killer – before I hadn't been able to get a picture like that I my head.

"My Queen," he turned towards my mother. "Will you give us a moment?"

She dabbed her mouth with a serviette, before sending me an anxious look. Then she slowly raised from her seat and left the room. Immediately my father stood and walked up to me, suddenly looking like a threat. His eyes sparkled.

"Don't lie to me, Analise. I know all about your little plan. I know that you have visited the boy," he pulled me to my feat, aggressively. I stared at him in disbelief. "One more act like it, and you will end like _him._ "

I couldn't help it. I just felt so angry and when that happens I usually do things, that could probably have been done a lot more efficiently and could also be more sensible, but I spat him in the face. He stared at me, chocked at first and then angry.

"Watch your back, Analise. You're my daughter, but if you go over to his side you're worth as much as any little gnome from their land."

I didn't know what to say. I writhed myself from his grip and then he stomped out after my mother, leaving me confused and more upset than ever.

"Excuse me?" I looked to my right and saw the maid from before come up to me. She smiled, but it seemed concerned and genuine, not like the millions of other fake smiles I had seen around here. "My name's Susan. I think we can help each other."


	7. Chapter 7

_Analise_

I wasn't a crier. For as long as I could remember, crying was never an option for me because to me it was something only weak people did. The few times I had tripped and grazed my knee, making tears come, my mother had held me tightly and whispered comforting things. She would send me to one of our servants to get a band aid, but I never actually went. I always thought of the stories my father had told me, about how some people are much less blessed and have to live on the streets or fight or die of hunger and thirst. As soon as those thoughts entered my young mind it would seem ridiculous to ask for a band aid for my little injury and so I would just go to my room.

So, when I broke into tears in front of a stranger I had never met before, it was very overwhelming. I noticed that crying didn't seem so strange to me anymore, not after the past couple of days, but my father's outburst had been the last drop. He wanted to kill me. He didn't _want_ to kill me, but he wouldn't have a problem with it either.

Susan stepped forwards and hugged me, like it was second nature to her. I hugged her back, not noticing much except for the fact that she smelt of pine cones and I heard the steady beat of her heart. It made me think of all the times my father had helped me or been there for me, but now all I saw were his hard eyes.

I pulled away, my breathing under control again, but the tears still running. Susan sent me a small smile. She was very pretty and suddenly I realized who she reminded me of.

"Susan Pevensie?"

She looked surprised, but then placed a finger over her mouth. "Is he okay?"

I didn't reply at first, not knowing what to say. "He's alive."

"Okay," she took a deep breath. "Okay. How much time do we have?"

"I…" my breath hitched and I turned red with embarrassment. This wasn't the time to cry. Besides Edmund's situation was a lot more serious than mine. I composed myself, before replying. "A day. Maybe one and a half."

"Then what?"

"They execute him."

"That means we have to get out tonight. Are you helping us?"

I nodded. "Of course."

She looked at me. "Do you want to come with us?"

"Yes."

I had thought about what I would say when that question would be asked, but now I knew for sure. I couldn't stay here. Despite my knowledge of what would happen to me, I still felt my heart ache when I thought about leaving this castle forever. I thought about how my mother would cope, what my father would say. My entire life had been spent in these corridors, rooms and halls and somehow I knew I would miss it.

Still – it was time to move on.

"Do you have a plan?" I asked.

Susan bit her lip. "We have to get in contact with Peter and Caspian. They're waiting outside."

"Caspian? I thought he was dead."

"No. Is that what they told you?"

I nodded. Caspian and I had never spoken, but I had seen him a few times. I remember watching him ride around the woods in awe, before my father had taken over the castle. I was so envious that he got to leave the grounds and I always used ' _but Caspian gets to go out'_ in arguments with my father.

"I'm sure you can leave, as a maid," I said. "Just say you're going to town to get something for the king. Our guards aren't particularly good at their job."

Susan smiled. "I realized."

"I'm the problem. And Edmund, obviously."

"I think we should flee. It's the only way. Caspian made it, I'm sure we can too."

"I… I don't know. Caspian was healthy and fit when he fled. It's harder than it looks."

Susan frowned. "I'm sorry. I keep forgetting that he isn't at his… peak."

"I know," I smiled at her, trying to comfort. "But there's not much harm in trying. If we stay here he dies."

"Should I contact Caspian and Peter?"

"Maybe have them stand ready by the doors? To help?"

Susan nodded. She looked me in the eyes. "I don't know why, but I trust you. Just know that if you ruin that trust… there's not much for you out there."

"I know," I said quietly. "I just want to help."

It was good to hear that she trusted me. She squeezed my arm and then beckoned me to follow her out the door.

 _Edmund_

Fog. It was like the fog from outside had snuck it's way into my cell and was hazing my vision. My whole body throbbed, my blood trying to fix all the damage that had been made. I groaned, as Miraz kicked my foot lightly.

"You're almost done, Edmund," he whispered. "I wish I could say I was sorry, but…" he crouched in front of me and looked at me, wiping some blood from my forehead. "I'm not."

"Oh, really?" I asked. I tried to sound at least a little bit threatening or careless, but it was a _little_ bit harder than usual.

Miraz laughed. He was alone with me, which was something new. Usually there was always at least one guard with him. I knew that that meant, that he knew I was too weak to fight.

"Analise likes you, Edmund. Yes, I know. I know all about your little… talks, your little plans. I have spies all over this castle, to listen in on conversations."

I looked at him, my heart pounding. "What are you going to do with her?"

"She's my daughter. Do you really want her to end like you? She will have to endure all this, just because you wrapped her around your finger." Miraz started removing dirt under his fingernails with his dagger. "Spare her, Edmund. Let her live the life she has been given. Where she belongs."

I didn't reply.

"She belongs _here._ With me. And her mother. _Not_ with your people."

"I think Analise should decide that," I hiss.

He slams the hilt of his dagger into my ribs. I groan and cough, even though the pain is just another addition. Almost my entire body has gone numb, trying to protect itself from the agony.

"Don't pretend that you care. You're using her. I know the way your little minds tick, all you want is revenge on me and my people," he whispered in my ear. I felt his breath on my skin, he smelt like the woods. Oh, I really wanted to head butt him but I knew it would probably do a lot more damage to me than to him.

"Believe it or not we're actually good people," I say.

Miraz pushes away. "Well then. I hope they're having fun wherever they are and can hear the news that you're dead through their neighbour."

Then he left and I listened to the key in the lock, before I slumped back against the pole and wished myself very far away.

* * *

I don't remember falling asleep. Maybe I just blacked out from the pain, but when I woke up there was a blonde curl in my face. I blew it away.

"Hey. Sorry I scared you."

I was disorientated, but I was able to focus on two figures in front of me. One of them surged forward. "God, Edmund. Oh my…"

"Susan?" I whispered. It seemed unreal. I must've been hallucinating.

"Yes. Yes, it's me," I felt her hands caress my face and I felt water drop on my hand. She was crying. "I can't believe… Oh, Edmund."

She said my name over and over again, and I really wanted to hug her but I couldn't. My face was so hot, but I was freezing. Every movement caused me pain. The fog was still there and it was like Susan's face was blurred and unfocused, every time she moved it took my brain a second or two to follow up.

I felt someone unlocking the shackles that bound me to the pole. Analise appeared in front of me. Susan seemed completely out of it, but my ears were ringing and I didn't understand anything. What was happening to me? It was like my mind was blacking out, but in a different way than I knew.

"Edmund, we're getting you out," Analise's voice somehow made it to my mind. At once I felt calmer, like there was nothing that could go wrong now. I trusted Analise, more than I knew. More than I trusted Susan? I didn't know. I didn't understand.

They pulled me to my feet, trying to be as gentle as possible. I winced.

"Sorry. I'm so sorry," Susan whispered in my ear. She said something else that I didn't get. The way up the stairs was clumsy and strange. I wondered where the guards were, why everything was seemingly so simple.

 _A trap._ Was it a trap?

"Stop," I whispered. I realized that my head was kind of lolling around and it had landed on Analise's shoulder. They couldn't transport me all the way out. It would fail and I would be the reason for both their deaths. "Run."

Analise shook her head. "No way."

"Please. Analise, run. Get out."

"Edmund," we had eye contact for a second. "Shut up."

I didn't say anything else, but I worried. Every time we turned a corner, I worried. Every time we would open a door I would want to hold the girls back, but I couldn't. I help so goddamn helpless and ridiculous.

And then suddenly we were out. I breathed in the fresh air, disbelieving.

"Almost there."

It was dark, but I had no idea what the time was. The courtyard was deserted, so when Analise stopped I wondered for a second. They sat me down on the ground, leaning against the stone wall and immediately Analise sat off in a sprint towards a little house.

"What is she…?" I couldn't finish the sentence.

Susan crouched next to me. I fought to keep my eyes open and as they started to close, Susan gripped my hand. "Edmund? Don't bail now. C'mon, we're almost there. Please…"

I looked at her, but I knew that my eyes were glazed over. I didn't really notice her. She wasn't _really_ there for me. When I had been sitting in the cell, I had thought that at the sight of one of my siblings I would be ecstatic.

I just wanted her to run. Leave me for dead.

Steps echoed in my head and then Analise was back. "We have five minutes."

They hoisted me back on my feet and I tried to stumble along. Still, I was almost a dead weight. We passed the house and I saw that the door was ajar – it seemed empty. Another few steps and I was back on the ground, this time with Analise.

"Where's Susan going?" I muttered.

Analise put a finger to her lips. She had nice lips. Pink and pouty. Really full. I wanted to touch them. I was drifting off and I knew it.

"Tell me something," I whispered.

"What?"

"I… I can't –" my eyes closed. I felt Analise panic. She sat up straight and touched my face.

" _No._ Not after all this, Edmund."

I fought, so hard, but it was like my lashes were glued together. My mind started drifting, the floating lights I saw behind my eyelids started vanishing.

"Please," Analise's breath was on my cheek. She smelt like flowers and honey and I breathed it in, enjoying every moment. I was slipping. "Don't give up."

Her words just echoed, bouncing off the walls of my tired, aching head.

Suddenly I was filled with warmth. It came from my lips, a fire that started burning throughout my entire body. It warmed my chest, dulling the pain, moving down towards my feet, my hands, my head. Was this death?

My eyes opened and in a way I expected to see clouds and angels. No clouds. Only one angel.

Analise pulled away. She was crying, but laughing, relieved. "How cliché," she whispered.

Now I understood the stories. All the girls in my school in Finchley – God, that seemed so far away, who fantasized about their first kiss, their first love. It was such a crucial moment and I would never have thought that something as simple as a kiss could save me.

I was still dazed, but somehow there was a little light in my world now. A little light of hope. I stared at Analise, her blonde waves, her beautiful skin. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

She sat back on her knees, relieved.

"It's clear."

I hadn't noticed that Susan had come back, but there she was, flushed. We were back on our feet, stumbling towards the gate. It all went so fast, all much too easy and then we were out. Out of the castle, in the woods and I was falling into an embrace and breathed in the familiar scent of forest after rain and Peter and home.

"Is anyone following you?" I heard Caspian's voice.

"No. But it was so easy. I'm a little on edge." Susan.

"Okay, let's just go." Peter.

I was on a horse and we were leaving it all behind. There was no sense in what was happening and all I got were brackets, small snippets of time. Were we galloping? Were we walking? How far had we gone? Was Analise here? What had happened in the courtyard?

Would I die?

I didn't know what was happening and slowly I didn't care. And so, when the darkness came, I let it embrace me.


	8. Chapter 8

_Analise_

I watched Edmund's chest heave up and down, up and down. The cuts had been bandaged and Lucy's cordial had been poured into his mouth, but there was no sign of immediate improvement.

"What do we do now?" Lucy asked, quietly. She was sitting by the bed, holding Edmund's hand. Her hair was messy and the young, fresh aura children had was less noticeable.

"We wait," Caspian replied. Our greeting had been short, but it had given me some kind of nostalgia. Déjà vu, maybe, but I don't recalling ever having anything to do with him. Maybe a wave from my bedroom window, as he practiced sword fighting. Or a 'What are you reading?' from him and then my reply. I had never thought that I would see him again, especially not since he entire castle thought he was dead. Or maybe just me, because apparently my father had been keeping more from me than I had thought.

I suddenly felt nauseous. "I need some fresh air."

"Let me join you," Peter said immediately.

I eyed him, not knowing what to say. "Sure."

Calling him 'High King' or even 'King' seemed stupid, so I just let him follow me down the hallways of Aslan's How. The sun was bright and the grassland seemed deserted. Everyone was inside, God knows why.

"They're all waiting for news," Peter said, as if reading my thoughts.

"Of course. That… makes sense."

We stood in silence for a bit, but it wasn't awkward. It wasn't a pleasant silence either though. He radiated authority and power, but at the same time he was the complete opposite from Edmund. Not making jokes or warm. More 'I'm better than you and don't you dare forget it'. I shuddered.

"Thank you," he then said, with a hint of emotion in his voice. Only a hint though, he didn't sound particularly sincere. "For helping Edmund."

"Your welcome."

"I know the story of how you got out… but not what actually happened while he was captured. Do you mind?"

I looked up at him. I suddenly felt cold and I realized, that yes I did mind. I wasn't ready to talk about my father, betraying me and torturing a young boy. I wasn't ready to talk about why I left, leaving behind all my "friends" – my mother, who had never done anything to harm me, the opposite actually. My dogs and cats, even my servants. It had been my life and I had left it behind. Despite how horrible it may have been there, that didn't mean that I wouldn't miss it.

"I'm sorry," I lowered my head and walked back into the How, not daring to turn and see his expression.

He didn't like me. It was incredibly obvious too and I hated it. All I had done was help. Sure, I knew that as daughter of the Telmarine King, I wouldn't be accepted immediately, but Edmund's brother? I had saved Edmund's life, while he wasn't doing anything.

Maybe that was it. Maybe he felt pressured or threatened. Maybe he thought I was planning to take over Narnia and throw him off his throne. Well, I probably could if I wanted but I didn't. He frustrated me.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, pulling me back. I turned. "Please, Peter. I just don't want to talk about it."

"Analise, you have to be careful, okay?" his eyes pierced mine. "You have helped Edmund. I have thanked you. I respect you and will be forever grateful for what you have done, but you _don't_ belong here."

The words hurt. I shook his hand off. "Well, maybe I would still be _where I belonged_ if you had come to help Edmund," I hissed.

" _I_ didn't know he was alive."

"That's a great excuse for letting your brother be whipped, cut, slashed, starved and tortured, isn't it?"

Peter shook his head. "You don't want to get on my bad side."

"Why do all the stories say that Edmund is the one not to be trusted, when it's clearly you?" I muttered.

"I didn't write those."

"Please just stop stating the obvious."

"Analise, all I wanted –"

I felt so angry. Who did he think he was? Were he and Edmund really related by blood?

" _No!_ All I've ever done is help. I'm sick of you people telling me to watch my back, because there's no reason for me to do so. I have _never_ done anything to harm anyone and I don't plan on it. Now please don't tell me that you don't trust me again, because _I don't care!_ "

I turned on my heel and stomped off.

What on earth was his problem with me?

Normally when I felt upset, I would want to be alone. Here I strangely felt drawn to the hospital room. It was near empty, only the doctor who had bandaged and disinfected Edmund's wounds was visible.

I sat down by Edmund's bed.

He was so pale, you could almost see through him. I shivered – it was like he was slowly vanishing. Touching his wrist, I was happy to feel a healthy pulse and I slowly put my hand in his, squeezing it. To my surprise, he squeezed back. It was weak and I almost didn't feel it, but it still filled me with joy.

"Edmund?" I leaned over him, inspecting his black hair, his long lashes and his lips. I wish I could say that I had completely forgotten about the kiss, but I hadn't. Had any kiss been able to wake him like mine had? Or was mine special to him, in some way? It hadn't been the ideal first kiss, but I had never seen myself as a hopeless romantic anyway. Having my first kiss save a life was quite a feat, in my opinion.

"Hi," he whispered.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

" _Amazing_."

I couldn't tell if he was being serious or not.

"I'll go get the others."

I got up, but he pulled me back. "Just wait a minute."

His eyes opened and the dark, dark eyes pierced mine. He smiled. "How long have I been out?"

"Just a couple of hours."

"Has…" he struggled to even speak.

"Save your energy," I said.

"No, I'm fine," he said. "Has anything happened while I was out?"

I shrugged. "Your brother hates me."

He chuckled. "I thought so."

"That's comforting," I said, pretending to be disappointed. I honestly didn't really care.

"Peter has to blame it all on someone, but don't worry. When he gets back from fighting the Telmarines, he'll be fine. He's just angry."

"Okay. That makes sense."

We sat in silence for a bit. I held his hand and stroked my thumb in circles.

"Can you help me sit up?" he asked.

I bit my lip. "I don't know. I think you should rest."

"Analise, _please_ don't treat me like I'm disabled."

"You are. For the time being."

He rolled his eyes. I gave him my arm to pull himself up by and with the help of his other arm, he somehow pushed himself into a sitting position. I knew he didn't want me to see it, but I noticed the wince and the fact that he didn't meet my eyes.

"Are you okay?"

" _Fine,_ " he muttered, obviously frustrated. He met my eyes. "Sorry."

I sent him a small smile, telling him that it was okay. As I went to get the others, I knew that there were things he was hiding.

* * *

Three days. Three days before Edmund was able to move around without constant help. Finally he didn't need someone to sit by his bed 24 hours a day. I was relieved and so was everyone else, but I think most of all he was relieved.

From he start he had refused to let people help him eat. _"I'm not going to be fed."_ Peter had teased him by tucking him into bed and Edmund had rolled his eyes and said ' _Thanks mummy.'_ Despite this improvement, Lucy was beyond confused and disappointment that her cordial didn't work.

Edmund tried to reassure her. "I'm sure Aslan sees this as a learning process for me."

He tried to cover it up as best as he could, but he felt pain. I heard him talk and groan in his sleep, he winced with every movement and too often he didn't meet my eyes or closed them completely, as if trying to focus.

"I feel so helpless," he told me one day.

His cheeks had regained colour and he wasn't as skeleton, scary thin anymore. His black hair was tousled and the white shirt suited him in way I couldn't describe. We had been joking about something, laughing even and then suddenly the whole atmosphere changed when he told me those words.

"I know. But that's okay, Ed. You can't just always be up and running, helping anyone and everyone in sight."

He chuckled. "What a saint."

"No, but seriously. It's okay to just relax sometimes."

"Relax? God, Analise, I'm not _relaxed._ You have any idea how annoying this is? I hear Peter planning the war, the duel and what not – he doesn't even ask for my opinion anymore. And when I ask him, he just avoids the question. He thinks I'm too weak. I _hate_ this."

I lean forward and look him in the eyes. "You're not weak, Edmund. In fact…" I look down at my hands, suddenly feeling overwhelmed. "You're one of the bravest people I know. So don't beat yourself up about things you can't do anything about."

It all happened so quickly. He cupped my face in his hand and pulled me closer. It was different this time. When our lips connected, I felt something explode inside of me and creep into my lungs, my blood and my heart. I wanted to dance around and jump and spread love, because I was so full of it. I grabbed a fistful of his hair, not realizing what I was doing and deepened the kiss, smiling. Heat rose into my face and I knew I was flushed, my cheeks burning but it felt good.

I pulled away for a second and stared into his eyes. They were shining and he smiled at me. "Wow."

I laughed breathily and kissed him again. He was the first guy my age I had ever met and I fall head over heels, in love with him. I thought of all the books I had read about love, about how they would do anything for the other person – but it was true. I couldn't possibly see him die and I would feel guilty my whole life if he did.

"Was that your first kiss?" he asked me.

"No, I saved your life with one, remember?" I grinned.

He smiled. "I mean your first…"

"Proper kiss?"

"Yeah."

I nodded.

"Was it okay?"

I nodded again and smiled. He stroked my cheek, gently. I had never seen him like this. He looked like he never wanted to let go of my hand, scared that if I left this room I would be killed. I enjoyed it, but in the back of my mind I was hoping he didn't turn into an overprotective boyfriend.

"Ana –"

"Edmund?" Lucy peered in. At the sight of our entwined hands, she grinned, but otherwise ignored it. "I just wanted to check on you, but I'll go again."

"No, it's okay," I smiled. "I was leaving anyway."

Edmund squeezed my hand and pulled me in for a last kiss.

"See you later," I said, out of breath for no apparent reason.

He nodded and I turned to leave. Lucy tried to wink at me as I passed her, making me laugh. I heard her say something to Edmund in a cooing voice before I closed the door behind me. I wondered how Peter would take the news.

* * *

 **A/N** I don't usually do these, so hello, hi, this is me talking to you (reader) live! (yeeeeha)

Anyway a Guest reader (if you're reading, hi!) gave me the tip to maybe find a different title, and I totally agree. So if any of you guys have an idea, you're welcome to comment it! Thanks. Hope you're all having an amazing day/night and if not, then I hope that this chapter made it a tad better.

If you have any wishes or ideas for the story, also feel free to comment those!

Love


	9. Chapter 9

_Edmund_

The next few days were a blur. Sleep, medicine, hugs, kisses, worrying, frustration and pain. These words literally summed up the first week or two, after being saved. Finally the day came where Lenio, our medic, decided I was allowed to take a walk. Oh Aslan, I needed permission to _take a walk?_ Life epically sucked.

Peter volunteered. He helped me push myself out of the bed I had been stuck in for way too long, and then supported me towards the gardens. I flinched, my ankle not used to actually being used. It was like I was carrying around my own little bed of nails under my foot and every time I stepped down I had to hold back some kind of reaction. Peter luckily didn't notice, even though he was inspecting my face and every movement very closely.

We somehow made it out the glass door, leading to the gardens. I smiled. The Kurinji Plant was blooming, a flower Susan had placed on both sides of the door. She was often in the garden, saw it as her place of tranquillity. Even now she was there, picking raspberries with some of the gardeners. She was speaking to Caspian, who was sitting on a bench behind her and when she saw us, she gave a big smile and a single wave. I sent her a pained thumbs up and she laughed.

Peter helped me sit on another of the benches, overlooking a bed of 'Chocolate Cosmos', an incredibly rare species of flowers. The dark red colour somehow appealed to me and I think Peter knew that I liked these.

"I knew they were blooming," he admitted.

"I had forgotten that you were a mind reader," I chuckled.

Peter shifted his weight, placing his hands on his knees. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, Peter. I was fine when you asked me this morning. I was also fine, when you asked me after breakfast and after lunch."

"I'm sorry," he shook his head at himself. "I'm turning into our Aunt Trudie."

Aunt Trudie was our father's sister back in Spare Oom. She lived in London, but when she did come to visit she would always bring the same gifts: soap, wash cloths and chocolate. Then she would fuss around for the week our parents allowed her to stay. She really was a master in fussing and lots of people couldn't stand being around her, but she was actually very kind.

"You look like her too," I commented.

Peter gave me a light push on my good arm, but he was laughing. We sat in silence for a bit, just enjoying the way the gardens looked. They really were beautiful, with all kinds of flowers, trees and bushes blooming and growing. I suddenly noticed some blonde locks peeking out behind a maple tree in the back, near where Susan and Caspian were standing. Averting my eyes, I recognized Analise and Lucy. Analise was reading, but talking to Lucy at the same time – they were laughing.

Lucy said something and Analise turned to look around. When she saw me, she grinned and waved. I waved back, ignoring Peter's sudden change in facial expression.

"You don't like her," I said.

Peter tensed and his mouth turned to one straight line. "We don't exactly mingle very well."

"Come on, Pete. You have some kind of unexplainable problem with her."

"She's a Telmarine. That's my problem, Edmund. All those people do is…"

"I've seen what they do," I snapped. He faltered. "But she's not like them."

"I just want to protect my siblings."

"Does she look like a mass murderer to you?" I asked. Peter looked over to where the girls were sitting. Analise was wearing a white dress with blue trimmings. Lucy must've made a flower crown for her, out of blue and white flowers matching her dress. Her golden hair reflected the sunlight.

"Don't judge a book by its cover, Ed," Peter said.

"Then what are you doing? Judging her by her family and where she comes from? Well that's a whole lot better."

"Ed…"

"Forget it," I muttered.

I was honestly pissed off, which wasn't a term I used often. Analise was sweet and selfless and Peter just goes on off his 'I want to protect you' cycle, which never ends (and always fails). It's not like he was going to protect me by being an arse to her. If anything, a good plan would becoming her closest friend, exploiting her secrets and then taking revenge or whatever. Peter's plan was not only stupid, it also gave me the impression that he enjoyed putting himself above other people. His change of character was infuriating.

I wanted to leave, but I couldn't do so on my own and I also didn't want Peter's constant worry hovering over me like a dark cloud.

"Is there any news with Miraz?"

"He's making a big fuss about getting his daughter back," Peter said pointedly. "He wants to corrupt us all."

"He wanted to do that all along," I remarked. Peter huffed. "Are there any particular plans I should know of?"

"No," he said innocently. I stared at him. He was the worst liar ever.

"Tell me, Peter."

"There is nothing to tell," he insisted.

"Oh, please. A couple more days and I'll be back to normal, don't treat me like I'm useless!"

Peter sighed. "Fine. I had the idea that instead of losing more lives in battle, I would fight Miraz in a duel."

"Until someone gives up?"

Peter sent me a pointed look.

"Oh," I said quietly. "Okay."

"What do you think?" he asked. I could tell by his voice that he was beyond proud of his idea, maybe not even thinking about the consequences. He was proud to protect his country and it was, indeed, a very noble decision but I couldn't help worry.

"It's risky," I said.

Peter deflated like a balloon running out of air. "Everything we do is _risky,_ Ed."

"And you trust Miraz that he won't kill everyone else once you're dead? Then no one on our side will be ready – it would be a bloodbath."

Apparently, he had already thought of this. "I'm willing to take that chance."

"Is everyone else?"

"We _have_ a plan, Edmund. Okay? We have back up plan A, B, C, D and the rest of the alphabet. I don't want innocent people or animals to die either!"

I rubbed my eyes with my hands and then picked around at the bandage around my hand. It was worn and a little bit dirty, but I had other things to worry about.

"When is this happening?" I asked.

"We haven't spoken to Miraz yet," Peter admitted. "We were planning on doing so in a couple of days, but there's still a lot of things that need to be organized."

I nodded. Why were things always so complicated when we were in Narnia? It sounded selfish, but in a way I would love coming here once and just enjoying it. Kicking it back on the white sand beaches, going for midnight rides – living like a _King._ At the same time I enjoyed helping people. And with the good comes the bad, for example the fact that I would've never met Analise if I hadn't been captured in that night.

Peter sent me glance. "Do you want to be alone for a bit?"

"Yes," I said, curtly. And so he left. I sat there staring at the flowers. I didn't really want anyone's company, except for Analises. It felt strange, knowing that my brother didn't like her. I had expected it to feel like I had betrayed him in some way, but somehow I felt that I had betrayed her. Like Peter was a failure for not liking her.

I kicked the thought out of my head. Analise wasn't someone who had to prove herself, not anymore. It was Peter's decision if he decided to like her or not.

* * *

 _Four days later_

"We're not sending you over there, Caspian," Peter argued.

I was sitting on the stonewall, watching the discussion. It looked kind of funny: the stone table in the middle, Caspian and Peter both leaning over from each side, fingers pointed. Analise was sitting beside me, poised and apparently interested in the conversation. My hand was on hers and I felt her pulse beneath the pale skin.

Lucy was playing with her dagger, twirling it with skill. Since she didn't come with us into battle yet, she always stayed home and practiced. Peter was a little surprised, the day he came home and she was in an intense fight with some gnome – I don't think that any of us are ready to see Lucy fight.

Susan had long ago stormed out, exasperated in the two young men.

"You're the one fighting – it will make you look weak!"

"I'll have two giants with me, Caspian, do you really think –?"

"I'll go."

All eyes turned to the girl sitting next to me. Analise looked uncomfortable with all the attention on her, but she didn't falter.

"I mean, why not?"

I stared at her, incredibly surprised. I knew she was brave but confronting her father seemed a little out of character. She had seemed so sad about his betrayal, and I would've thought that she didn't want to think about him. "That's not happening."

She held my hand tightly and said quietly, so that only I could hear it, "Ed, this is my chance to show your family that I'm not about to betray them. _Please._ "

"I think it's a good idea," said Caspian.

Peter scrunched up his eyebrows. He obviously knew that if she _were_ a traitor, this would be her chance to get back home. But is she wasn't then he would definitely know, when she came back.

I felt my heart beat faster. If they then took her away, there would be no way of getting her back. Ever.

"Fine," Peter said.

Analise smiled. "Thank you."

"I'm going with her," I said. I wasn't letting her walk away like that, not after everything we'd been through.

"Don't be ridiculous, Edmund," Peter said. In the back, I heard Caspian say, "I'm having déjà vu."

Analise looked me in the eyes. I absorbed her beautiful dark blue eyes, so full of wisdom. They didn't look like the eyes of a fifteen year old. I wished that she weren't so stubborn. "I can take care of myself."

"I know that," I said. "But…"

"No buts," Peter interrupted. "If Miraz gets hold of you again, Edmund, he'll definitely kill you."

"He'll kill her too," I argued.

Analise looked at her hands and I suddenly felt a little guilty for saying that.

"I doubt it," Peter said.

I scrunched up my eyebrows. I remember Susan telling him about what had happened the day we had escaped. Peter took a deep breath and I knew he had been thinking about this for long.

"Miraz may be inhumane to Narnians, but how do you think his people will react if he kills his daughter in front of his warriors. No one would follow him anymore, because he killed, not only one of his own, but his own daughter."

"I'm a traitor to them," Analise spoke up. "He's probably made up some twisted story, but even if he hasn't helping you guys and then running away is a crime."

"So… he can just kill you?"

"Yes," Analise emphasized, obviously not wanting to discuss how much her father wanted to kill her anymore. "But you're right. I don't think he will. My mother would never forgive him and I did have friends in the castle, who wouldn't just let it go. He knows that."

"So it's settled. Analise goes by herself and Edmund stays here," Peter said.

I glared at him. "Since when did you command me around?"

"Since you were almost _murdered_ by these people."

There was short silence. I realized that Peter was probably just trying to protect me, but he was getting out of line. I wasn't his slave and I certainly didn't do whatever he told me to do.

"And so what?" I asked. "I was almost murdered by the White Witch. I could've been killed from falling off my horse or from drowning, but that didn't stop you from sending me to war. Besides it'll be a good way to show Miraz that I am fine and that he should be afraid."

"No offence, Ed, but you don't look particularly dangerous," Lucy said. She hadn't spoken the whole time, but I could see in her eyes that she didn't want me going over there.

"That's because of my white hospital shirt, but that can be changed," I said sternly, but it was meant as a bit of a joke. Lucy smiled, but it didn't look like she really found it particularly amusing, which was (strangely) a common response to my jokes.

Peter opened his mouth to speak.

"Peter, nothing you're about to say is going to change my decision," I told him. Peter looked like he really wanted to say something, but then just sighed.

"You're bringing your sword."


	10. Chapter 10

_Analise_

Edmund looked at ease as he rode next to me. Lucy had told me that when Edmund rode his horse he was the most comfortable and now I could see that she was right. I was riding a beautiful chestnut horse, called Mocca. She and Phillip talked the entire way to the Telmarine camp, which kind of gave me the feeling of comfort. Sadly, the way wasn't very long.

"They've set up the camp five hundred metres away from the How?" Edmund asked, raising his eyebrows.

I nodded. "They don't have a lot of patience."

I looked his way, afraid that he would be very pale or shaking or anything like that, but I was surprised to seem him looking more confident and healthy than I'd ever seen him before – which wasn't saying a lot, since the first time I saw him he had stained our beige rug red.

A giant and a dwarf had decided to accompany us. Each time the giant took a step the earth vibrated beneath us. The grassland looked almost dead – no brightness, just faded greens, yellows and greys. A small creek snaked it's way next to us, towards the trees. The weather was horrible as well; the clouds hadn't given room for the sun in ages.

Edmund thought it was Aslans work.

I knew that they knew we were coming. The soldiers may be arses, but they weren't stupid. Our castle was rumoured to be the most guarded palace in all of Telmar, which _apparently_ didn't mean a lot considering how easily we escaped.

But the Telmarines knew order and they took it seriously, even if didn't always succeed. I knew they were looking at us right now, through a pair of binoculars, watching the white flag dance in the wind. They will wonder, if we're here to declare our giving up. They will recognize Edmund and me, especially and they will tell my father. That's when my knowledge stopped, because I had no idea how he would react.

I had a few theories, some nicer and more pleasant than others. I took a deep breath and sent Edmund a reassuring smile. He had been watching me – nervous. I hoped that he trusted me, because if I turned now he would most likely be dead.

I realized that I was the second white flag. My appearance would confuse and would let the warriors falter, if they were ordered to attack. Glancing down at Mocca, I hoped she was a fast horse.

"Ready?" Edmund asked.

I nodded and we rode into the camp.

I spotted my father immediately. It was like his eyes found mine as soon as we entered through the clump of bushes that were meant to hide them from view. The sound of metal clashing against metal hit me like a wave of sound. Soldiers that saw us stepped back and stared, as if in doubt of what they were actually seeing.

We rode up in front of where my father and the other lords were sitting. They were whispering together, hushed. They probably didn't even want their king to hear any of it.

My father, however, didn't take his eyes off me. I sent him a smile, as cruel as I could master and at the same time a piece of me broke. We were rivals now, in oppose to two weeks ago when he would ask me how my lessons went and how my breakfast egg tasted.

I hopped down from Mocca, surprised that Edmund had already made it down without much difficulty. His jaw was clenched though and it hadn't gone unnoticed by me.

"Analise," my father greeted me. Was it a greeting? Or a warning?

I nodded curtly. "Hello father."

"What are you doing?" he asked. He sounded like he actually cared, but I noticed his glance to the men surrounding him. So this was his plan: he was going to make him look like the victim. He was just a father who had done everything right and his rebellious daughter runs off to the enemy side, leaving him no choice but to kill her. Oops. Poor me.

I gritted my teeth and got out the paper scroll that Peter had given me. This was it. My final destiny definitely did not lie with my father, that was for sure, because the look he gave me now really was a record of his.

"If you do this, Analise, I –"

"I know," I interrupted. Then I began: "I, Peter, by the gift of Aslan, High King of Narnia, Lord of Cair Paravel and Emperor of the Lone Islands, in order to prevent the further loss of lives, do hereby challenge Lord Miraz in single combat upon the field of battle. The fight shall be to the death. The reward shall be total surrender."

I finished, struggling for air. Edmund sent me a small smile, but I didn't respond. I felt like _I_ had just challenged my father to duel to the death. He looked like a bird searching for his pray. His eyes scanned my face, my body, before averting them to Edmund. He didn't say anything at first, but his message was clear.

 _I hate you._

"Tell me, Edmund," he said. "Why would I risk such a proposal when our armies can wipe you out like _that._ " He snapped his fingers.

"Haven't you already underestimated our numbers? Only a week ago Narnians were believed to be extinct," Edmund replied, confidently. He didn't seem like he had a care in the world and it annoyed me. I felt like the world was crumbling beneath my feet. My eyes were glued to the ground, I didn't dare look at my father. Edmund gave another intelligent, snarky remark.

My father asked another question, Edmund replied.

I tuned in again, not wanting to start sobbing right now and here. That would be a bit pathetic.

"I didn't say that I would refuse," my father was saying, laying emotion into every word.

Edmund clearly seemed happy about this answer. "So it's settled."

"Very well," Miraz agreed, before turning to look anywhere else but at us. "You can leave."

He made a small gesture with his finger and Edmund was already mounting Phillip, but I couldn't get myself to leave.

"Analise?" Edmund asked carefully.

 _Move._

"I'm sorry," I stammered. "I'm coming."

I turned with my back to my father, leaving. I was leaving. A part of me wanted to hug him, the other part wanted to kill him. The trees started swimming and it took me three tries to get my foot into the stirrup. My cheeks were burning. I couldn't stand it here a second longer and so I nudged Mocca a little harder, setting her off in a trot away from all this. As soon as we were out of the trees I set off in a gallop, but not towards the How.

Anywhere else. I had no place to go. Reality sunk in and so came the tears, streaming down my face.

"Analise!" I heard Edmunds voice behind me. Oh Aslan, how was I going to explain this to him? I didn't stop. _Please don't follow me._

Phillip was faster than Mocca and he was able to catch up quickly. "Slow down!" he yelled, but I didn't. I didn't even meet his eyes, not wanting him to see my tears and red eyes. I should stop and I knew that, but I didn't.

He fell back. I felt stupid and pathetic, for wishing that he would follow me. I _wasn't_ that girl, I didn't want to be that girl who was depending on guys for happiness. But fact was that right now, I had no one if not Edmund. I had Lucy, sure, but we didn't know each other particularly well and I think she was just sweet to everyone.

I don't know how long I rode, but suddenly Mocca drew to a halt. "I am sorry, but I need a break," she informed me.

My cheeks heated up. "Oh, no, I'm sorry. That was selfish."

I jumped off immediately and Mocca went to drink from a small river running in front of us. I looked around. We had gone deep into the woods; there was no sign of outside light as far as I could see. The light was dimming and I knew I should get back. Would they worry? Would Edmund worry? I would sure as hell worry if he were gone – had I really just messed everything up?

Mocca was lying down in a patch of sun. Her eyes were closed and I decided to let her rest before I headed back. I leaned up against a tree, the heat of the day slowly vanishing with the light. The bark was rough against my shirt. I took some grass between my fingers and rolled it around, making a little cylinder before throwing it back onto the forest floor.

I was tired, more tired than I had expected. Adrenaline might've been what had kept me going these past days, because there wasn't much sleep. Suddenly all the things I'd been through caught up with me and my eyes slowly closed.

 _Just a small nap. It won't harm anyone._

I silently agreed with myself.

* * *

" _Ana?_ "

I opened my eyes. I was still in the forest, the sun was almost completely gone.

My father stood in front of me, Moccas bridle in his hand. She whinnied in protest, but he didn't seem like he wanted to hurt any of us. He calmed the horse down by stroking its flank and I prayed that she wouldn't speak, because then things could turn out a lot differently.

I backed up against the tree.

"Father."

He smiled, as he sat down. He was alone, just a black stallion drinking from the creek. I admired its beauty, but also noted that I had never seen the horse before even though I had spent a large chunk of my childhood in our stables. In their stables.

He took my hand and circled his thumb over my palm, like Edmund often did. "How are you?"

"What… What do you mean?"

I was disorientated and didn't really know if I should trust him our not. His strong arms enveloped me in his scent – was he hugging me? He pulled me closer to him and kissed the top of my head, like he hadn't done since I was nine.

"We miss you at home, Analise. Your mother misses you."

"I miss her too," I heard myself saying. His kindness was unexpected, but I enjoyed the moment knowing it would be one of the last.

"You know why I never let you out of the castle, right?" he asked softly.

I shook my head numbly.

"I wanted to protect you. From all of this. That's why I hurt Edmund, you know. I felt so angry that you had seen him like that. What if you had never opened that door? You'd know nothing of the Narnians, of all the beasts."

"They're not beasts," I said, but my voice was quiet and almost inaudible.

" _Yes,_ they are."

I didn't respond. He got up and stretched out a hand.

"Let us go for a ride."

It wasn't a question.

In a daze I took his hand, the hand I had held so often, with it's rough and sunkissed skin. He helped me up and brought me to Mocca, helping me get up as well.

"No," I said, suddenly finding my voice again. "No, I don't want to go on a ride with you."

"Please," he almost begged. I was taken aback. I could handle him angry, but begging, almost crying? No thank you. "Please, Analise. I never got to explain. You made such drastic decisions, I didn't have the time."

I felt a pang of guilt spark in me. Why? I had no reason to be guilty. Mocca whinnied nervously, as he mounted his stallion.

My subconscious was screaming at me to stop. I half wished for someone to show up and haul me back, but I followed him deeper into the forest. What was going on? _Turn around while you still can._ The forest grew darker, the sounds quieter, until there was nothing. I couldn't even hear the hooves on the ground.

Then the chanting began. It was the kind that you heard in native American movies, when they danced around the fire. It grew louder and louder, until it was the only thing I could hear. My heart started beating faster. Something was very screwed up about all this. I screamed and kicked Mocca to turn, but she didn't, she couldn't. My breathing turned ragged.

"Did you ever hear the phrase:," my father turned to look at me. His teeth were shining, in harmony with the silver in his hand. He didn't look kind anymore, he looked like a plain maniac, his smile too big for his face. His eyes were haunting, swirling with madness and possession. I couldn't recognize him at all anymore. The last humanity that had been left in him had been sucked out. "To win you must sacrifice?"

I knew what was going to happen. I cried and cried, couldn't jump off my horse, was just frozen in place.

I screamed as he plunged his knife into my heart.


	11. Chapter 11

_Edmund_

Screaming. That's what made me accidently kick Phillip a little too hard, so that he jumped, almost making me fall off and then galloped at his fastest pace in the direction of the sound. I knew who it was. It was a sound I had had nightmares about, one that I had hoped never to hear. It was Analises scream.

My mind immediately came up with the worst case scenarios. She was being tortured by a Telmarine who wanted revenge. She had been stepped on by a horse or attacked by a wild bear. My heart was pounding in the rhythm of Phillips steps.

"Analise!" I yelled, praying for a response. Nothing came. The screams had stopped. I felt sweat pouring off my forehead, my fingers were cold but my face was boiling. I shouldn't have gotten her out of my sight. I had just thought that she would maybe want a little alone time, and so I had ridden a bit around, until the sun started setting. That's when I decided I should find her.

Phillips hooves pounded on the forest floor.

"Oh, Aslan," I muttered to myself. _Please._

The trees began thinning out. I heard a horse whinny and the sound of water.

And there she was.

She was lying on the ground, writhing, as if in pain. Tears were streaming down her face and she let out the occasional whimper. Her eyes were closed. I jumped off Phillip while he was still moving and kneeled down next to her.

"Analise! An –"

She screamed and I felt like a piece of me broke. It sounded so helpless, so scared. I picked her up in my arms and cradled her in my arms. A shaky breath, a fistful of my shirt and her eyes opened, revealing those deep, sea blue eyes.

"Oh, Edmund," she whispered. Her back was pulsating with sobs. I felt her tears through her shirt, onto my chest. Her arms were wrapped around my body tightly, as if she never wanted to let go. I breathed into her hair, saving the scent of it in my mind.

"Are you okay? Are you hurt? Did anything happen?" my mind was racing.

"I fell asleep. I had a nightmare, I…" she breathed deeply, trying to calm herself down, but it was useless.

The crying stopped, but it didn't get better. It was like she was gasping for air, fighting, completely out of control. They were sobs without tears, just her chest heaving up and down. She was empty of tears.

"I'm so alone," she whispered, into my shirt.

I hugged her tightly. "No, you're not. I am never going to leave you."

Another sob, empty of water or noise. She swallowed. I stroked her hair, her cheek, trying in every way to comfort her, but it was like every time she calmed down she found another reason to cry. This wasn't how I was used to seeing her. She was brave, talented, fearless. She seemed so… broken. I didn't want to be forced to pick up the pieces.

"He hates me," she said, shakily. "They all hate me."

"They don't deserve you," I replied.

She shook her head. "He hates me," she repeated. She buried her face in my shirt. "What have I done?"

I felt a pang of worry – did she regret helping me? Coming with us?

Suddenly she pushed off, getting up and staggering backwards. "I can't do this," she said, more to herself than to me. "In my dream… I followed him blindly. I can't be in his presence, Edmund, I'm going to…"

She put her head in her hands, looking distraught. "I'm scared."

I got up, to stand in front of her. "So am I. But I know that you're trustworthy and intelligent and you're not going to let yourself be brainwashed by… him."

"I have to leave," she whispered. "I have to be away from him, as far as possible."

"What do you mean, leave?"

"I don't know!" she said, frustrated with herself. "God, I'm such a failure."

I stepped forward. "No, you're not!"

"Is that all your going to do, Edmund? Just tell me that I am a great person? I was born to be like him!"

" _That doesn't matter,_ " I said sternly. The situation was getting out of my capacity to handle. I realized that this was a lot deeper than I had thought.

"I _love_ him," she sobbed. "And I can't help it!"

She turned away from me, crying again. I put a hand on her shoulder, but she shook it off.

"Your brother was right," she muttered. "You can't trust me."

"What changed your mind? Seriously Analise, I would follow you _blindly._ I trust you with my life!"

She turned around biting her lip. "I just… don't want to lose my family."

"I know. I don't want to either."

"I don't know what to do."

"That's okay."

"No, it's not! I'm not like this. I don't lose it like this. I just wish –"

I pressed my lips to hers, finally shutting her up. At first she was startled, but then she deepened the kiss. I felt the tension she was holding escape and she visibly relaxed a little. Pulling away, she hugged me, tightly.

"He killed me," she whispered.

"Huh?"

"In my dream. My father killed me. And I knew he would, but I still followed him."

"It wasn't real," I try, not really helping much.

She buried her face in my shoulder, breathing in. "It felt so real."

I stroked the back of her head, thinking of all my dreams about the White Witch, Peter, Lucy or Susan dying. "I know," I muttered. "I know."

* * *

We rode back in silence. The sun had set long ago and the moonlight would've been the only light, but it was covered up by clouds.

"We have to stay here for the night," I said. We had been riding for too long to be on the right track.

She nodded, playing with Moccas mane.

* * *

When I woke up, she was already awake. At first I didn't see her and scrambled around, half blind in the morning darkness. The sun had only just started to peek up behind the mountains.

She was sitting, with her back against a tree, observing a bird perched above her. And she was humming a song – it sounded like a child's nursery rhyme.

I closed my eyes and listened.

A few minutes later it dawned on me how worried my siblings must be, especially after what had happened. As I pushed myself up, I had to bite my tongue to try and handle a sudden excruciating pain in my ribcage.

Analise turned and smiled at me. "Good morning."

I took a deep breath to compose myself. Should I be worried? "Hello there."

"How'd you sleep?"

"Did you even sleep at all?" I retorted.

She nodded. "I woke up half an hour ago."

"Let's get going."

"Okay."

We mounted our horses and trotted in the direction of the sun, which was where the How lay.

"Any more dreams?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "No. Luckily."

She was lying. I had heard her whimpering last night and it wasn't something I was about to forget. Maybe she had just forgotten or maybe she didn't want me to worry.

"The duel's today," I commented.

"Yes."

Her reply was quiet. We had eye contact for a moment and I saw how sad she was. Her eyes weren't filled with the lively brightness that they usually had, only a hint of worry. And despair.

"Don't let me out of your sight, okay?" she said.

"Of course."

"God, I sound so helpless," she shook her head at herself. "I just... I really need you."

She sent me a tiny smile, basically only a twitch of her lips but it was enough.

The words made me happy, despite the circumstances. She needed me. I knew that she didn't actually, she could perfectly well take care of herself. It meant that she trusted me, more than she would just let on.

The How started towering up in front of us and we set off at a gallop, me already coming up with excuses to hold Peter at bay and Analise from crying.

* * *

"Where, in the name of _Aslan,_ were you?" Peter bellowed. He came running out of the castle, eyes red and tired, looking furious, but his eyes had that glim of worry that he somehow always managed to have.

"Relax, Pete, everything's fine."

Peter sent me a look and then averted his eyes to Analise, who was looking down. "What did you do?"

"She didn't do anything," I said, carefully jumping off Phillip. "Seriously, we just lost track of time."

" _Lost track of time?"_ Peter asked, furiously. "The day before the big duel, in the middle of a war – and you _lose track of time?_ You're a _King,_ Edmund, pull yourself together!"

I felt rage build up inside me. What was his deal?

"Look, I'm sorry! But you should seriously calm down. You don't own the world, you know," I hissed at him.

He looked surprised, to say the least. I usually never retorted anything, kind of just let him calm down again, but since no one else was planning on saying anything, maybe I should.

"You're not the King around here, Peter, Aslan is and stop treating him like he doesn't exist," I had gotten my voice to sound reasonably steady, because Peter was one of those people whose only real argument was 'stop talking to me in that tone', like he was my father or something. It annoyed me every time. "Maybe you could even take some time to take care of your siblings. Little reminder that Lucy's 11 and in the middle of all this too."

I brushed past him, feeling his eyes bore into my neck, but to be honest I couldn't deal with this right now. I was tired and aching and incredibly hungry. Also I was kind of worried about the pain I had felt this morning. Lucy, who had been feeding me with her cordial, every three days – totally overdoing it, but she forced me anyway and I was willing to do it if it made her feel better and there was enough left to heal any injuries after all of this was over. She had told me that she was sure that I would be fine by the duel came around. I had felt fine too, just the occasional burst of pain or ache, but nothing like this morning.

Walking down the hall, I realized that I had no where to go really. My bed had been in the infirmary, but now I guessed that I would be sleeping with Peter, which was a place I didn't really feel like going right now.

And so, I found myself walking into the room where the stone table stood. Without really comprehending it, I drew my fingers down the stone, trying to decipher the words that had been carved. The deep magic.

"Aslan," I whispered. "Help us."

A shiver went through me, and despite me not knowing if that happened because I was cold or because Aslan really as giving me a sign (which would be rather unusual), I decided to take it as a sign. Everyone needs a little hope.

I turned on my heel, walked out the room and decided to get ready for battle.

 **A/N Oh my Gods, I am incredibly sorry that I haven't updated… I was on holiday and there was no internet and I've been very caught up in Nick Robinson fanfic and the start of school, so it's been a little hard.**

 **I am also sorry that I didn't update after I left you guys with a cliffhanger like that, but I'm going to try and get a couple of chapters up this weekend!**

 **Love**


	12. Chapter 12

_Analise_

Roaring. That's all I could possibly muster the moment we exited the How. All kinds of creatures stood perched above us, yelling, cheering, screaming. I bit my lip. They were so sure that we would win – how were they so sure? How could they not now that I would run up and stab Peter in the back? I didn't know myself. I was a traitor in a way, to everyone. Maybe not completely guilty, but I wasn't innocent despite Edmund's constant trust in me. It killed me to see him trust me so much. I couldn't let him down. I wouldn't.

I would watch my father die. I would watch his blood pool on the ground. I would hear myself scream. And after that? Anything could happen.

I glanced to my right. Caspian looked pale, but sure of himself. He walked with pride, his armour glistening in the sun and his longish hair framing his face, making him look older and more experienced.

Edmund walked in front of us, one hand clenched in a fist, the other tight around his sword. As he looked back to check up on us, he sent me a reassuring smile and I wanted to kiss him right there, for being so stupid, but oh God, so sweet.

Peter walked in front. He didn't look prideful or confident, he looked down right furious. If looks could kill, father, you'd be in for it.

I couldn't help but think how stupid I must've looked. The only girl walking there. Why Lucy and Susan hadn't come, I don't know. Maybe it was too dangerous. Or maybe they wanted their best archer poised in a position, ready to kill, maim or injure.

But no, I wouldn't let that fact make me look weak. What had my mother always said?

" _Walk, not like you see yourself higher than everyone else, but like you don't even need to compare yourself to anyone. Chin high, eyes sparkling and smile wide. Even when you're walking into the arms of your enemy."_

I had never though that my own family would be my enemy one day.

The cheering died down, as Peter reached the place the fighting arena. There was an eerie silence, but the air was filled with electricity. Every body was letting out emotion – fear, anger, pride. Including me, but I didn't really know how I was feeling right now.

My father stepped into the ring. I had been scared that at the sight of him, I'd run away or likely, but I was surprised to feel completely empty. He looked evil, as he strode up to Peter, with his ugly mask and his ugly armour. God, this whole place was so ugly.

I had heard stories of Narnia before the Telmarines. Most books had been burned, but I had found one or two that had given me a different perspective on life back then. When I had heard Edmund's stories, I had been a little bit enchanted. Dancing tree nymphs, green grass, forests – it all seemed too good to be true. There was Telmarine towns all over the place and thousands of trees had been killed just for us to live there. I had never thought of trees as living things, but now I almost felt bad.

I looked back at the army behind my father. They all wore their ugly masks to this nice meeting too. How great.

If they were both duelling to the death and the reward was total surrender, then why the hell were the Telmarines so geared up for war and the Narnians looking so on edge? Something was up.

Peter walked back to where Edmund was standing, looking a little slumped. I wanted to go and slap him, to tell him that he should at least try and look confident. There were hundreds of people praying that not more of their people would die and he wasn't exactly giving them more hope, by looking like someone had already died.

He muttered something to Edmund, who nodded. Then he sent me a look, a piercing stare, forcing me to look down at the ground. Why did he hate me so much? Or had it been a warning? I shivered. He couldn't read minds could he? Maybe being a King of Old, he got some special powers?

Okay, I was officially worrying too much.

Edmund took a couple of steps back, standing next to me. I glanced at him, taking in the sight of his long, dark lashes, his plump lips and his brown eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asked me.

"No," I said back. Why lie? "But I'll manage."

He took my hand and squeezed it tightly, but he didn't let go after that. Someone blew in a horn: The battle was about to start.

"Are you worried?" I asked him.

"Yes."

"Do you think we can win?"

He didn't reply at first. "I hope so. I just don't understand… why he brought _all_ his soldiers."

So he had been thinking the same thing as me.

"It's a duel, not a battle. At least that's what the scroll said," he muttered.

I wavered, before answering. "Aslan won't let the Narnians go extinct again."

Edmund huffed. "He's done it before."

"Trust me," I whispered. "He won't."

I don't know why I was so sure, but from the beginning I had known that my father would die. It was like there _was_ no other conclusion to this. The bad guy always died in the end.

Edmund pulled me closer to him and kissed the top of my forehead, filling me with temporary joy. I ruffled his hair with my hand and I wanted to cry so badly, but was empty of tears. Empty of all emotion, except for love to this one human being, the only genuine, sweet, selfless person I really knew.

"Thank you," I whispered in his ear. "Thank you, thank you."

* * *

Chaos.

"Run, Analise! Go inside!"

I didn't know where the voice was coming from, but I recognized it as Edmund's. The duel was over. The Telmarines had willingly surrendered, the thing everyone had expected the least. At first cheering from the Narnian side, they were going to celebrate for months on end.

The Telmarines were gone. Leaving.

Hundreds of years the Narnians had been plagued by my people, they had been driven to the edge of extinction, they had been murdered, tortured and had been forced to flee. And then their beloved Kings and Queens of Old return. Naturally, the Telmarines will just surrender, right? No one beats the Kings and Queens.

The laughter came to a halt when the first stone was thrown at the How. Massive and heavy, it cracked the walls, came tumbling down. Everybody ran for their lives.

Then the second rock was thrown and a chunk of the building fell.

"Please," I now felt Edmund's hand on my arm. He was holding his sword and had a cut on his cheek. The Telmarine army was approaching. "Please run."

"I can't leave you!" I choked. "I have to help!"

He didn't reply, but gave me a kiss, so sweet that I wanted to freeze this moment and just keep it in a jar next to my bed. _Okay, something is officially wrong with me._

Then he gave me a light push in the direction of the How. I took Lucy's hand and sprinted inside, away from the oncoming army, the screams and terror. Why did my father have to do this? Did he not realize how many innocent beings, even children he was killing?

Or did he just not care?

"How do you do it?" I asked Lucy, quietly.

She had pulled me around a corner and slid down the wall. It felt cowardly to hide in here, but it also felt ridiculously dumb to run out there and pretend I could fight. I was good in combat in the arena, with Edmund, whose steps I knew. I was also intelligent, I could use my wits to lure people into a trap or likely. Man, that sounded stupid.

But in the middle of a battle? With people attacking me from every side, not knowing from where the next person would come from? I'd be stabbed by three knives and a spear, maybe an arrow, in the matter of three seconds.

Lucy looked dead calm, but there was a sadness and worry etched in her face too. She seemed so much older than she was.

"What?"

"Staying calm. You're so young – I would be screaming for daddy, if I were you."

She picked at her thumb nail, eyes dark. "I've gotten used to it. Even daddy went to war."

Not knowing what to say, I took her hand and pressed it to my cheek.

"Don't feel bad for me," she sent me a small smile. "I'm a couple millennia older than you anyway."

"That is true," I smiled back.

"Besides, I've fought in wars. I only had to stay away from the fighting until I was 14 back in the Golden Age, that's when I joined. And Susan stayed back."

My eyed widened. "Susan didn't accompany you into all the battles?"

I thought of her out there, fighting for her life and for the lives of many others. I had seen her hit bulls eyes enough times to know that she had had a lot of practice. She seemed to keep her brothers on the ground as well, always being very optimistic. Leaving without her for battle, seemed very unlikely.

"She started hating wars," Lucy admitted. "I understand her, though. Luckily there weren't many back then. It was more of an escape from the war at home, being in Narnia, I mean. When we came home, she was the saddest of all."

"Spare Oom?"

"Finchley," she nodded.

"Do you miss it?"

"I know that I'm going back. So, no."

"You can't stay?" A wave of panic rushed over me. Life without the Pevensies? It would mean that I would be alone, a single Telmarine, in a land of Narnians. Would they like me? Accept me?

"No. Narnia is a place for us to learn, not live."

"God, you sound so old," I blurted out.

She laughed and it still sounded like a small child laughing. It almost broke my heart. Had she even really had a childhood? All four of them saw Narnia as such a blessing, but sometimes it seemed horrible to send four innocent children into this world.

What did I know – the Golden Age had probably been a lot more… golden than this one.

A loud boom made us both flinch. Lucy shivered a little. I wished that I had something to give her, to comfort her with, but first of all I wasn't good at stuff like that and second of all, this didn't seem the time to make a hot chocolate for her.

The wall behind us shook. I turned to inspect it closer, then averted my eyes to the ceiling above us. It was a common way of architecture – stone and wood pillars keeping the roof from crashing down, rocks, clay. The pillar to our right shuddered violently as another loud crash sounded from above.

Lucy grabbed my hand.

"We can't stay here," I muttered. Moments after a crack appeared in the nearest pillar, long and wide. I slowly got to my feet, making sure not to put any pressure on the wall behind us. Pulling Lucy up we exited the hallway.

My hands were shaking, as we ran through the corridors. I didn't exactly know where we were heading – away from the crack, but also away from outside. Was there a bunker here somewhere? Lucy didn't know and neither did I.

We turned another corner and entered a room, only to stop dead in our tracks. Narnians were sitting all over the place, looking scared and frightened, trying to comfort each other. I noted that they were all young, from toddler ages to around 15. They must've been evacuated when the Telmarines attacked.

"We have to stay here for now," Lucy said.

I nodded and we both sat down at the entrance. I watched a centaur stroke her little brother's hair soothingly. As another crash sounded the whole room flinched and the atmosphere grew even eerier. The air felt electrified, like every single person was holding in so much energy. I realized that I had been pressing my nails into my palm so much, that it had started to bleed.

Everything was silent for a bit, until steps sounded outside. Running, no sprinting, like the person was running for dear life. It wasn't hooves either. Lucy clenched her fists and I knew what she was thinking. It would've been highly intelligent if a Telmarine had snuck in here and would kill all of us. It would not only send hundreds of our soldiers into a spiral of mental agony, but would also be an amazing distraction.

The person turned the corner and my heart almost stopped beating.

It was Caspian. In his arms was a recognizable raven haired king.

 **(A/N Sorry I keep torturing Edmund. Whoopsy)**


	13. Chapter 13

_Analise_

I didn't even really comprehend what was happening, all I knew that my chest sunk like a balloon letting go of air. "What happened?" I asked, surprisingly calm.

Caspian blew his hair back and I suddenly considered how annoying it must be, for a guy to have longish hair in a fight. Which was probably the wrong time to think about something like that, but I couldn't help it, especially when he pushed another lock behind his ear, frustrated. I almost handed him a piece of cloth so that he could make a ponytail.

"He just collapsed," he muttered, adding: "Really bad timing, Edmund," underneath his breath.

"But… Lucy's cordial –"

"Yeah, well, it apparently didn't work!" Caspian snapped.

"Have you checked his pulse?" I asked, holding two fingers to Edmund's neck. I was rewarded with the dull throb of his blood being pumped through his veins underneath the skin. "What's happening out there?"

"You don't want to know," he shook his head, absentmindedly. "I have to get back out there," he sent Edmund a worried glance, then scanned the room. "Where's Lucy?"

I had placed my head on Edmund's chest, listening for a steady and healthy heart beat. Without realizing I had taken his hand in mine, squeezing it, hoping for a squeeze back. I looked up at Caspian. "Huh?"

" _Where's. Lucy?_ " he asked, laying emotion into every word.

"Are you blind? She's –"

I turned to show him that she was sitting right behind us. But the place where the brunette girl had been sitting only moments ago was empty. In it's place stood a glass bottle with a minimal amount of cordial left.

In the dust the word _Sorry_ had been etched with a small finger.

I looked back up at Caspian, then back to where Lucy was missing. "Is she kidding me right now?" I sneered, through clenched teeth. This was the last thing we needed right now. She couldn't just run away! Was she thinking to join the fight?

"Are _you_ kidding me?" Caspian exclaimed. "She's not even 12 years old, you can't just lose her out of your sight like that."

"I'm telling you, Caspian, she was here a second ago!" I had gotten up and was spinning in circles, trying to see her anywhere.

"God, Peter's going to be so mad."

I don't know why, but something about that sentence clenched a cold fist around my heart and I was filled with panic. Why did Peter's opinion mean so much to me? _Because Peter's opinion means so much to Narnia._

I shoved the glass vile into Caspian's hand. "I'll find her."

"Don't be stupid, you can't –"

"Do you have a weapon I can use?"

"Analise," his eyes suddenly looked down right worried.

" _Do you have a weapon I can use?_ "

He sighed reluctantly and muttered, "Edmund's going to kill me," before pulling a dagger out of his boot.

"Dagger's are harder to fight with, but if you're unsure, throw it, run and hope it lands somewhere painful," he sent me a forced smile. "Try not to die."

I nodded, before setting off in a sprint out of the room. I ran down the hallways, turning corners, hoping to see a brown plait somewhere. Obviously Lucy had some kind of plan, and I knew it. She may be young, but she sure as hell wasn't stupid.

Breaking out of the musty, dark corridors of the How, I felt a surge of confidence. Tessa, one of my maids, back when I was living in the castle, used to say 'if you need confidence, just pretend that you're the main character in your favourite book'. With fairy tale creatures running around me, shooting arrows at each other, it wasn't particularly hard.

I tried to stay hidden beneath the rocks that led into the How. The battle was in full swing. I stepped over a groaning soldier, making sure that he wouldn't be able to stab my calf first. I did in fact realise the widening of his eyes when he saw me.

I think he tried to spit on my shoe, but I kicked him in the torso without his saliva doing _much_ damage.

Creeping forward, trying to stay safe, I realised that I had no idea what my next move was going to be. Was I just going to charge through the battle field, yelling Lucy's name? I needed a distraction – but how did you distract an entire army? I wasn't about to strip down to my underwear and do a little dance. Besides, that probably wouldn't help. They were so focused on their fighting, they probably wouldn't even notice. Even if they did, it wouldn't make any difference. Honestly why did I even have that idea?

I sat on the edge of the field, observing for a few seconds, apparently waiting for a miracle or a distraction or _anything._

Then it happened. And, my God, it was not a miracle.

* * *

I watched the rock fly over my head and I could swear that almost every head turned, looking after it. The Telmarines hadn't been firing for a bit, so the sudden _whoosh_ over the battle was a surprise. I looked back to the catapult, trying to see who had let it go.

The slim, but muscular figure, the dark hair and beard – I immediately recognized him. It was my father and his smile was so big, so cruel, that it sent shivers up my spine.

The stone crashed into the How with a gigantic crash. It was like everything happened in slow motion.

The very top of the How looked like it was sinking into itself. The walls started crumbling and a chunk of stone fell onto the next, which loosened it, making it collapse as well. It was like domino bricks, all falling after each other but downwards. Through the entrance you could see the corridors caving in, billowing with dirt and dust.

I heard someone scream. I think it was me.

 **A/N Short chapter whoops, but I love cliffhangers. Hehehe I'm evil. Sorry not sorry. Love u guys peace out bye**


	14. Chapter 14

_Caspian_

"Everybody out!" I bellowed.

My heart was pounding. Chips of stone were falling onto my shoulders, my head, my face – the dust was blinding me. I was standing at the entrance of the room everyone had been staying in, pushing the young Narnians out, one after one.

"What's happening?" a girl cried. She looked so distraught, her hair messy, her face stained with tears. It made me think of the day I found out that my father was dead. I clenched my jaw. I couldn't let these children die, even if it was the last thing I did.

A loud crack sounded from above. Glancing up, I was already expecting the worst and the sight of the long fissure on the roof above me did nothing but make my heart pound quicker.

Edmund was leaning against the wall, still dazed. He had woken up, gasping for air, only seconds after Analises departure. To be honest everything had happened only moments after she had left. It was like the catapult only decided to throw the object, knowing that she was safe. I realised that that actually was a possibility.

The last and eldest of the children ran out, the last one being an older brother with his little sister on his horseback. It reminded me of the Pevensies. Edmund was holding a hand to his head, looking through glazed eyes.

I didn't understand what had happened. Why had he claimed to be fine, when he was clearly not? He was just like Peter. Idiots both of them. But in a way, they were also both geniuses.

"Ed, c'mon," I heaved him up, slinging his arms around my shoulders. He was ridiculously easy to carry, making me think of how healthy and strong he had been before all of this. No one would ever know what had really happened in that castle, except for him and maybe Analise. I couldn't help but think that Edmund was the strongest of the four.

He tried, but it really didn't help me much. His weak steps were really more disabling than good, but I didn't comment. It's not like he was capable of running out, even though that would've been the most practical right now. We stepped out the room and a couple of steps down the hallway, before the room caved in behind us with a crash. I winced. Only a few more seconds and we would be covered in debris as well.

Somehow we made it to the last corridor. The light was seeping in in front of us. I breathed out in relief realising that the children had all made it out, but I was more than worried about me and Edmund. The entire structure was breaking in on us and there was at least another 150 metres.

"Caspian!"

I looked up, my face covered in sweat. Analise was running up to us and I had never been happier to see her. Her face was smeared with dirt, her eyes were piercing. I understood why Edmund liked her so much.

"Oh God," she took Edmund's other arm and together we made it towards the exit, faster now. We were going to make it. I almost laughed out loud, right then and there.

Behind us, the corridor started collapsing. Analise took a swift glance behind us. "Go, go, go!"

We both sat off at a faster pace, dragging Edmund between us now. Almost there. Almost there. The rocks crashed onto the ground behind us, like a fire, urging us to go faster. In the last moment we jumped, leaving the darkness of the How behind us and landing roughly on the ground outside. The rocks tumbled after us for a meter or so, before sliding to a halt and covering up the complete entrance.

I looked behind us, then lied down on my back. "Whoo," I muttered, taking deep breaths.

Analise got up, shakily. "I –" a psychotic laughter escaped her, before she leaned over and threw up. I wasn't even disgusted – hell, I had seen worse things in my life than that.

"Edmund! Caspian, God –"

Susan came running. I was so disorientated, I had no idea what was going on in that battle right now. Was it even still relevant?

Susan kneeled down next to me, eyes wide, before pulling my face close to hers and smashing her lips onto mine. To be honest, I had imagined our first kiss a lot more romantic but this worked just fine. It wasn't particularly passionate or soothing, it was more like you-almost-died-and-I-realised-I-hadn't-kissed-you-yet kind of kiss.

She pulled away and hugged me, kissed me again, then hugged Analise, then Edmund, although it probably didn't make a big difference to him, since he was still pretty sluggish. She looked up at us.

"I thought…" she muttered, but waved it off.

"Lucy's gone," Analise said frantically. "I'm sorry, she just ran off."

Susan looked at her and smiled. "I know. I know. Hey, it's okay," she added, a little perplexed at Analise's worried expression. She looked like she was about to cry, while Susan had a proud glow to her face.

"She was looking for Aslan."

"And?"

"Well," she sat up straighter. "I think she found him."

* * *

 _Lucy_

Not laughing was probably the hardest thing I had ever done.

There I was, alone on the bridge, with a full Telmarine army in front of me, the worried faces of the Narnians, telling me to run. I was standing with my tiny dagger and Aslan's words echoing in my head: _"If you were any braver, you'd be a lioness."_

I saw a blonde head of hair running up behind the Narnians, pushing through, so that she was standing at the very edge of the waters. Analise. I felt a pang of guilt when I saw her, knowing how bad she must've felt when she realised I was gone. She would've never let me go though and sometimes you had to do what you knew was right.

Expecting a sour glare, it was hard for me to meet her eyes, but when I did I was rewarded with a shining eyes and a huge smile. I smiled back.

This was when I had to contain my laughter. I get it, when the King of… the world, I guess, steps out from behind an 11 year old girl, you're bound to get some crazy expressions. Since I had been watching Analise, I also got to observe her jaw drop open and then her face lighten up in a mixture between awe and passion.

I remembered the feeling of seeing Aslan for the first time, but the difference was that back then I had had no idea who/what Aslan was. Analise and all the Telmarines had heard stories about him since they were born.

Aslan made the world golden. Literally. I don't know if it was because the sun reflected on his fur or because he was the sun, because he lit up the sky, the grass, the river that was keeping the Telmarines from all attacking at once.

"He's real," I heard someone say and smirked. Miraz glanced back at his soldiers, with a weary look in his eyes. I felt so much hatred against him. He had tortured my brother, invaded my country.

I saw Analise stare at her father's head, looking melancholic. She knew. Aslan spared lives, but Miraz didn't deserve to live.

Aslan walked up next to me and met my eyes, smiling. I braced myself, as he opened his mouth and led out the long awaited, but somehow familiar roar. It was so loud that the water rippled and the Telmarines all had to take a step back.

Behind them I saw something rise out of the ground and other long, tall objects creep nearer from the woods. The trees. It was slightly comical, to see the trees move like spy ninjas.

"They're alive," I smiled, grinning. I wanted to hug all the trees around me right then and there. As the Telmarines began realising what was happening, they fled to all sides, most of them into the river. The others were thrown into the river by the roots of a nice maple tree, all except for Analise and Miraz, who stood there, mouth agape.

"She's the girl?" Aslan asked, nodding towards Analise, who looked taken aback by his gesture. I nodded. Aslan sent her a smile, which made her look at her feet, before moving his paw slightly.

Loud gasps and yelling was the reaction we got. I understood completely. The river, a couple hundred metres down, started moving. And not just small waves – no, it built up and up until it was a gigantic wave. And then the wave grew a beard and eyes and a nose and there he was, a man made of water, at least twenty metres tall.

The wave-man started moving forward with incredible speed. The soldiers scattered, trying to get out of the river, but the current must've been too strong.

They were all lifted up by Neptune (or whoever he was), before being thrown down the stream. Most of them came up again, gasping for air. Aslan wasn't killing them, he was teaching them a lesson.

I watched Miraz' horse take a couple steps back, but the water overlapped and pulled both in. The water guy let the horse float upstream, before helping it back out and held Miraz in his huge hand. It must've been very hard for Miraz to look particularly scary right then and there.

Analise was staring at her father, jaw set. Looking at her now, from the other side of the river, she didn't look like daddy's little girl. She didn't look like a princess. She didn't look like _anyone's_ sidekick.

She looked like a fierce warrior. Her face was smeared in dirt and her hair was matte with dust. She had a small cut underneath her right eye and her clothes were tattered. But at the same time, her eyes were glowing. And I mean that literally. I couldn't tell of they were blue or grey or green, they were kaleidoscopic, changing colour every moment.

She stood confidently, a dagger in her hand, looking ready to take on anything. As she watched her father vanish with the stream she didn't utter a word, not a movement, not even a twitch of the eye. As her eyes met mine she sent me a tiny smile, before turning around and walking away.

I turned to look at Aslan, who stood calmly. He nodded at the water God he had created and it vaporized.

"What now?" I asked.

Aslan looked at me, eyes kind. "We shall see, dear one."

"Are the Telmarines… dead?"

"I have killed no one."

"Why?"

He paused before replying. "You mustn't forget, that even those who have done great evil are alive. Even Analise's father has a wife at home and, if she is willing to accept that, a daughter. He is not finished in this world."

"But the Narnians will kill them!"

"The Narnians will not make the mistake that the Telmarines made, dear one. I will make sure."

I huffed. "Some –"

"Lucy."

"Sorry."

He chuckled. "Go see your siblings."

My heart jumped at the thought, but then I remembered what had happened. "Edmund…"

"I have taken care of that."

I smiled, before hugging him. "You're amazing, Aslan."

He chuckled again, making me feel warm inside. "Thank you," I muttered into his fur.

"Go," he gave me a light push with his head and I waded over the river and ran in the direction of the How, with an unfamiliar sense of pride in my chest.

 **A/N This was so bad hahaha but you know how hard it is to write dramatic scenes? Dam. Okay, this is short too but to make up for it I'm nearing the end of dis story AND I already uploaded one yesterday so yay**

 **Heheh baibai**


	15. Chapter 15

_Edmund_

"Lucy!"

We kind of collided in the middle of the battle field, both covered in dirt, blood and sweat.

I didn't really remember the past 4 hours of my life. But I did know, that Lucy was alive, just like Peter, Analise, Susan and Caspian. And ¾ of my country, which was pretty satisfying, considering that they had all been extinct only weeks ago.

I pressed Lucy closer to me, breathing in the scent of her hair. God, she felt so feeble, so small. When she looked up, she was smiling, showing off her crooked teeth. I realized that the amount of freckles on her face had almost doubled while in Narnia. Why had I not noticed that earlier?

"I am so proud of you," I muttered.

She grinned. "I'm really happy that you're alive."

"Me too."

And a little surprised. But I didn't mention that to her.

I _did_ in fact remember that. The whole battle had been a blur to me – I had just jabbed at anyone wearing dark armour and trying to kill me, which had pretty much worked. Then I had felt that same pain in my ribs like the other day, but only thirty times worse. I must've blacked out, but I kept getting snippets of the world around me, until I fully woke up, laying in front of the How on my back, which Susan stroking my hair.

No pain at all anymore, only scars. But I didn't mind my scars, they were part of my story now.

I looked over her shoulder, to see Aslan. He was smiling at me and bowed his head in respect. I nodded to him, smiling back. He probably wanted to talk to me, but now wasn't the time, so I buried my face in Lucy's cinnamon coloured hair and hoped that I was making the right decision by ignoring his wishes for a second.

"Let's go back to the others," she muttered. I didn't reply at first, so she urged on: "Ed?"

"Yeah, yeah. You go ahead, I just quickly need to do something."

She turned and grinned, when she saw Aslan. Giving him a small wave and me another hug, she walked back towards the How, probably to save some lives or something else casual, in the day of 11-year-old Lucy Pevensie.

Aslan walked up to me, while I was still looking after her. Maybe I was checking if she would make it there safely, despite it only being a few hundred metres.

"Edmund."

I looked into the dark eyes of the lion. "Aslan."

It was impossible not to say his name without some kind of awe to it. He was the king of us all and that was exactly was his aura told you. There was no way to overlook it.

"Your road has been long."

"Tell me about it," I bit my lip, wondering if that was too much, but he just chuckled.

"I couldn't have helped you much, even if I had tried."

"I know. I don't blame anyone," except maybe Miraz. And his millions of soldiers, but whatever.

"That is good. It doesn't suit you to hold grudges," he smiled knowingly at me, and I couldn't tell if he was being serious or not. "Besides, everything happens for a reason, right?"

He nodded towards the How. A girl with blonde hair was helping a soldier to his feet. She was glowing in the sunlight, her reassuring kindness almost reached us.

"She's very beautiful," Aslan commented. "But not only on the outside."

I nodded. "I know."

"I shall talk with Peter. And with Caspian. Narnia will need new leaders once you are gone."

I glanced at him. "Analise?"

"It has a ring to it."

I grinned. "It sure does."

Analise helped the soldier to the How, laying him down carefully. She got up, wiping her hands on her shirt, then looked around. When she noticed us, she smiled and made her way over.

"You have grown into a brave man, Edmund. Often braver than your brother. Influence him in the best way possible."

"I will," I turned to face him again. "How long will you stay?"

"As long as I am needed. The Narnians haven't seen much of me in the past hundreds of years, they deserve that."

"Thank you," I nodded.

Aslan prodded away, bowing his head at Analise, as he passed her. She looked after him in awe.

"He's so… nice," she said, as she came up to me.

I laughed. "What did you expect?"

"Well, he did almost drown an entire army, I wasn't expecting him to pay his respects to me," she said, but there was a tone of humour in her voice.

She smiled, tracing her fingers over my cheek. Then she hugged me tightly. "You're such an idiot."

"Is that a compliment?"

"No," she looked at me, still circling her thumb over my cheek. "I can't believe you didn't tell me that you weren't okay."

I cleared my throat. "I didn't think it was worth mentioning."

She hugged me again, muttering: "That's what I said. Idiot."

I played with a lock of her hair for a moment, before kissing her cheek. My lips wandered down her jaw, to her neck and then up to her lips, where they wavered for a minute, before colliding with hers.

She deepened the kiss, by grabbing the back of my head and pulling me closer. I pulled away for a second, to say: "How the hell do you still smell good after all that?"

She grinned. "Shut up," then pressed her lips to mine again.

Finally she pulled away, biting her lip, looking a little sad. Which is not what I want a girl to look like after we've made out, to be honest.

"What is it?" I cupped her face. "Hey, Analise?"

"I just… what now?"

"What do you mean what now?"

"I mean, what now? What happens with the Telmarines? What happens when you go back to Finchley? What's going to happen to Narnia?"

"I –"

"How long are you staying?"

I paused. "Aslan decides that."

"Because when you leave, we're most likely never going to see each other again."

"I… haven't thought of that."

"Of course you haven't," she smiled apologetically. "You've had enough to think about. God, I'm sorry, this is the first time that you can kind of relax and here I am telling you all this –"

"Analise, it's fine. Narnia isn't a vacation for me, I admit, but that's what I love about it."

She bumped her head lightly on my chest, groaning. "I'm a little scared that when you guys leave, the Narnians will all turn and start a riot against me."

I chuckled at the thought of hundreds of gnomes, jumping up and down, with big signs saying: 'We want no Analise!'. She glared at me.

"It's not funny."

"It is a little funny."

She pouted, but then gave in with a smile.

"Let's not worry about that now," I muttered, kissing her head. "Worrying isn't going to help anyone."

"You're right," she kissed my cheek. "Let's go…"

"Be authorities?"

"Exactly."

I grinned. "Just doing my job."

She slapped my arm, before taking my hand and pulling me back to the How.

* * *

 _Analise_

"How is it going?"

It was funny to hear Edmunds voice change from joking to serious in the matter of seconds. Obviously he couldn't be all fun when he was in his role as King of Narnia.

"We have not lost many."

The centaur nodded in respect, also when he saw me, making me blush. This wasn't what I hadexpected at all. Edmund drew in a relieved breath at the words. I squeezed his hand reassuringly, knowing that his thoughts were with the families who had lost soldiers.

"Where are my siblings?"

He pointed to the right, where I spotted Peter and Susan crouching, talking quietly.

"Thank you."

We walked over to them. Now I also noticed Lucy standing a while away, talking to Reepicheep. Her bottle of cordial looked dangerously empty, but then again, there was barely any injured left.

At the sight of his brother, Peter jumped to his feet and ran to us, embracing Edmund. "You're such an idiot!"

"I have been told, thank you," Edmund muttered, but he was smiling like a maniac.

When I saw Peter's face I was surprised to see more emotion than ever before. His eyes were shining and teary, but he was laughing. His hand was wrapped in gauze, but otherwise he looked fine. Susan hugged Edmund as well, leaving me alone with Peter for a short second.

He grinned at me, before embracing me as well. I scrunched up my eyebrows, feeling a little out of place in his string arms, but decided not to question it for the time being. He let go and took an awkward step back, sending me an apologetic smile.

"Sorry about… everything."

"It's okay. I would've probably reacted the same way."

I most definitely wouldn't have, but there was no reason in making him feel even more uncomfortable. Our relationship wasn't something I wanted to waste another thought on.

Susan hugged me too, smiling.

"Thank you for everything, Analise. You're… You're amazing."

I smiled at her, feeling overwhelmed. Amazing. Not a word I had ever really been described with. Mostly _beautiful, elegant, charming._ In my life as Miraz' daughter I had been to plenty of balls and dances. Everyone complimented me, told me how gorgeous I was and in a way I had loved it.

Sure, I had always been a fighter, loved books and cultures, but thinking back I couldn't help but think how vain I had been. In a way Edmund's kidnapping had turned out for the best in the end.

I plopped down onto the ground, the exhaustion and lack of sleep from the past week hitting me. Edmund sat down next to me and I leaned onto his shoulder, looking up at him.

He looked so regal and poised, but at the same time I kept forgetting how young he actually was. How young everyone here was. Lucy was one of the best examples. She was so young, years younger than me, but there she was healing people, helping, laughing and reassuring. When I was 11 I had only just begun getting into fighting. I watched Caspian train every day, envied him, but when I asked my father he hadn't allowed me to.

By the time I was 13 I had been throwing knives secretly in the attic, but my father walked in on me one day. I tried developing as a fighter for so long, but my father had always been the obstacle. I had always just thought that he tried to protect me, but now I knew that he had only tried to protect himself.

"He will be killed, won't he?" I asked.

I honestly didn't know the answer. Aslan didn't seem like the kind of guy to publically hang someone or likely, but just letting him go didn't seem fitting either.

"I don't know," Edmund admitted. "Miraz has killed a lot of people, Ana… but so has Peter. So have I."

I nodded. I wasn't going to tell him that that was okay, because 'he had only killed bad guys'. Killing was killing. And no matter what a person had said or done, death was not a fair punishment. Not in my opinion, at least.

"I don't want him to die," I said. "I just want him out of my life."

"Of course."

"I wonder if he'll want to talk to me."

"He'll probably try and use you to save himself," Edmund shrugged.

I scrunched up my eyebrows at him. I know it wasn't fair of me, but I felt like no one was allowed to talk down to my father except for me. But Edmund had gotten his fair share of cruelty from Miraz, so I pushed my anger back down.

"I wonder where my mother is."

"I'm pretty sure that the Narnians have invaded your castle. She's probably a prisoner somewhere."

"Why do you say it with such ease?" I muttered.

He looked down at me, confused. "No offence, Analise, but your mother isn't kind. She's one of _them._ "

I turned around, suddenly feeling attacked and vulnerable. Why was he suddenly like this?

"So am _I_."

"You're innocent."

"Oh, and you know for a fact that my mother has stabbed someone? You don't know her, Edmund!"

His eyes widened, but then he closed them for a second. When he looked at me again he looked different. Older, meaner – more experienced. I wanted to strangle myself. Why did I always ruin everything? I should've just let him ramble. He was angry, which I should be able to understand.

But I didn't.

"I'm sorry, but you haven't ushered a _word_ over your mother. I would've thought that if you loved her, you would –"

"You haven't mentioned your parents once either."

"This is different!" he spluttered, frustrated.

I didn't realize when, but I must've gotten up at some point, and now Edmund was getting up next to me. He took my hand tightly. "I'm _sorry._ I just… I assumed…"

Why was I so mad?

But I knew. I knew why I was mad. My parents had been my home. Not the long cold corridors of the castle. Not my room. Not my books. My parents had been there for me my whole life, maybe not always being the ideal parents, but still. I guess that now that I had lost my father, losing my mother had been a fear of my subconscious self.

Hearing Edmund talk badly about her had been the last drop. I couldn't see my mother, my sweet, sweet mom, who braided my hair before I went to sleep, who brought me breakfast in bed on my birthday, who told me stories from her childhood – she couldn't be evil. She couldn't and she wasn't.

It was still hard for me to comprehend that my father was cruel, but mom? I couldn't let that happen. She had a fire inside of her, one that I had inherited from her, and now, looking back, I couldn't help but think that she wasn't brainwashed by my father. Sure, she had obeyed him, but… something just didn't fit into the picture.

"I need to find her."

"I'll help you," he said.

I smiled at him, grateful for his words. "Thank you."

I followed him through the clumps of people sitting around. We had almost made it to the group of soldiers, guarding some Telmarine warriors when I felt it. The strange feeling of someone boring their eyes into my back, but when I turned there was no one.

"You ok?"

I nodded absentmindedly. Edmund walked up to one of the Narnian soldiers. He looked strangely brought up, almost devastated. I scrunched up my eyebrows, putting a hand on Edmund's shoulder to hold him back a little. I wanted to hear this.

"What is the matter?" Edmund asked quietly.

I looked behind the soldiers to see the other Telmarines grin up at me. A shudder went through me at the sight of the cruel eyes and yellow teeth – had I never realized how downright evil they looked?

The Narnian soldier leaned forward and whispered something. I inched closer, but to my surprise and frustration Edmund lifted an arm to hold me back. I took a step back, infuriated.

"Seriously?" I muttered.

He sent me a look saying 'not-now-please'.

If he wasn't going to help me, fine. It wasn't like I needed his help to find my mother. Glancing around I noticed further guarded groups of Telmarines. My mother have ought to be in one of them, so I silently took a few steps back before turning around and leaving.

 **A/N Hey guys!**

 **1) I am aware that I suck at updating, but so much is happening in my life right now so bear with me.**

 **2) I am also aware that my story has little to nothing to do with the actual Prince Caspian book/movie. Personally I just hate it when I read fanfiction and it's literally the EXACT same story, just with another character added into the mix. What. Is. The. Point?**

 **3) My characters are also a little different. I love getting feedback and constructive criticism, but I just want to point out that also when a director takes a book to turn it into a movie, he/she can change whatever she/he likes :) I'm sorry if I sound a little selfish, but I'm just trying to make a entertaining story, not an exact replication of C.S. Lewis' books.**

 **4) I honestly don't know if this story is turning out for the better, but we'll see. DON'T WORRY I will finish it no matter what, but if the last couple chapters are not as good and structured as the first, it's because I'm a little confused myself. I kind of make up the story as I go, so if the story line doesn't always make sense I'm sorry about that too hahah**

 **5) I LOVE U HAVE A GREAT DAY!**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N I'm deeply sorry for this chapter. Do not hate me. I'm crying. Bye.**

 _Analise_

I walked towards the group furthest away. I don't know why I was drawn to that one, but it was guarded more than the others, so I had a sneaking suspicion that the most important prisoners would be here – like my parents.

When I arrived I was disappointed. There was only a handful of stronger soldiers. At the sight of me, one of them stared in disbelief.

"Miraz' daughter?"

I nodded curtly and then sent an apologetic smile to the Narnian guards. They looked at ease though, so they must have known that I wasn't on the side of the Telmarines.

The soldiers exchanged looks – their eyes were grim, but they were smiling cruelly.

"Lookin' for your parents?" the same guy asked and spat on the ground.

I nodded again, this time less sure of myself.

"They're being…"

"Guarded in the forest," another soldier butted in.

The first turned around to glare at him and when I turned around to leave, I missed the short interaction they had with their eyes, telling each other something fatal. I walked toward the forest, not really knowing what I was planning on saying to my parents. Would they apologize and really try to use me to stay safe, like Edmund had said? Probably.

 _Stay strong._

I entered the woods and immediately the light dimmed down, the sun being blocked out almost completely by the thick, living trees. It smelt like moss and greenery, the way a forest was supposed to smell. I breathed it in deeply, enjoying the thought of trees protecting me all around.

Nature was impeccably beautiful, something that I hadn't much time to find out about in my life of corridors and fancy dresses. Edmund had told me that in Spare Oom, there were even more amazing places than in Narnia, tropical places, with rainforests and waterfalls. I had always thought that this was only possible in dreams.

The deeper I went into the forest, the more confused I got. Where were the prisoners? Had they fooled me? There was no point, strategically, in holding them hostage in here – in fact it was kind of unintelligent. If they did escape, no one would notice and it would take a few minutes before anything would be able to be done. By that time my father would be too far away.

I slid my hand down the bark of one of the trees, caressing it, as I walked around it in circles. I had stopped searching, but why not stay here for a little longer? As I reached the other side of the tree my fingertips felt something that wasn't bark.

I looked up and saw that someone had engraved letters into the tree. They were so big that I had to step back to fully see them and when the words dawned on me, my heart beat sped up:

 _RUN_

 _Edmund_

"What do you mean, you can't _find_ him?"

The soldier looked embarrassed. "It means that he was swept away by the wave and we haven't been able to locate him yet."

"How typical," I snorted. Finally we win a war, we capture almost all of the Telmarines, _except_ their King.

"It is not ideal. He must still have all his weapons, for we didn't find any of them in the lake or on the shore. He should be weakened by the lack of air, while being pushed under by the water though."

"That won't last long," I muttered, grimly.

The soldier shifted his weight, nervous. "We can only hope that he has some kind of injury."

I suddenly thought of Analise's wish. "And the Queen? Where is she?"

"She has been taken captive in the palace. What shall we do to her?"

"Spare her. Her daughter would still like to speak a word with her."

"Yes sir."

I turned, but the solider put a warning hand on his shoulder. "My King?"

"Yes?"

"Keep your loved ones close."

I scrunched up my eyebrows, strangely intimidated by the comment. "I shall."

He nodded at me, before turning and bolting away.

I looked behind me, to tell Analise the good news, only to realize that she was gone.

"Analise?"

I spun in a circle, once, twice, but she was no where to be seen. What the hell? I called her name again, getting wearier and more nervous by the second. Had she seriously just wandered off, right now?

I felt a stab in my heart – I had snapped at her. She had taken a step back, right as I turned back to the soldier. We had been looking for her mother. She must've kept going to find her.

I swore under my breath. Did the soldier I had just spoken to seen where she had gone? Why would she do something like that – she knew I would worry! God, couldn't she just wait for two minutes?

One thing was sure: I had to find her, because her serial-killing, bloodthirsty father was on the loose, and I didn't know whether that was good or bad. Would a father spare his own daughter?

I doubted it.

 _Analise_

I took a wary step back and then stumbled over something, landing flat on the ground. When I looked up I was staring into the dark eyes of my father – I must've fallen over the bare foot that was hovering an inch above the ground. I scuttled backwards, chocked over his appearance. He was dripping wet, with bloodshot eyes. His hair was plastered to his head, he was breathing heavily and looked almost psychotic.

"Hello sweetheart."

I got to my feet and took another few hesitant steps back, bumping into a tree. I glanced back at the big letters, telling me to flee – I hadn't even really had the time.

"What do you want?" I asked, jaw clenched. I felt nothing but raw anger towards him now, nothing but hatred. He wasn't my father anymore.

He stepped forward, pushing me into the tree.

"It's quite simple actually," he whispered into my ear. " _Revenge._ "

A cold shudder ran down the back of my spine, but I kept my cool. "For me spitting you in the face?"

He pushed forwards, pinning me between the tree and him. The hilt of his sword felt cool against my hip. His breathing was ragged and warm, tickling my cheek.

"I wouldn't get too feisty. As far as I know… you have no weapon," he felt my belt, where some kind of sword or dagger would usually be fastened. "No one knows you're here."

"They'll find me," I muttered, but I was getting less sure of myself.

I had to get away. Running was my only possibility now.

"Oh," he chuckled. "You don't have that much time."

 _Now._ I collected all the saliva I had and spat it into his face, hoping for a short moment of hesitation. Then I pushed him away with all my might, turned around and attempted to run. A sliver of hope sparked, but only for a second. Then Miraz grabbed my foot, making me fall as long as I was.

I screamed, frantic now. I must have called Edmund's name, because Miraz laughed. "Calling for your little man, are we? _He won't make it._ "

Tears began running down my face, the fear of dying really dawning on me now. I didn't want to die! There was so much that I hadn't lived through, hadn't experienced. If I died now I would never go mushroom picking in the woods, I would never have real friends, I would never see the world. These might seem like small things to most people, but in that moment my biggest fear was having taken the only thing that had ever been given to me: life.

"Don't. _Please don't,_ " I kicked and tried to fight him off, but with no luck. I sounded like a small child, but I was so scared. We were all the same that way: no one wanted to die before the time had come.

"Oh," he faked a concerned look and wiped away my tears. I attempted to punch him in the face, but missed again. I couldn't focus on anything, I just punched, kicked and spat at everything possible, distraught.

"Goodbye Buttercup."

I stared at him, surprised. That had been my nickname when I was little and it sent a new wave of sadness and disappointment through me.

He lifted his dagger and destroyed the only hope I had left. He cut through the string that I had been holding on to for dear life. I felt my body slack, my energy run out of me like a waterfall. A last tear escaped my eye, before I knew that it was over.

Then it all turned off.


	17. Chapter 17

_Edmund_

I yelled her name before I reached her, but I knew the moment I saw her limp body on the ground that I was too late. I skidded to a halt and landed on my knees next to her, lifting her light figure into my arms.

"No," I whispered, while searching frantically for a pulse, a heart beat. Cold. Still. Dead. "No."

She couldn't be dead. We had gone through so much together – her dying was the last thing I had expected. Gently I wiped her tear stained cheeks and swiped her blonde locks away from her face. I wanted to shake her, kiss her awake, but I knew that no matter what I did, nothing would change.

Aslan would help her. Aslan had to help her, I told myself, he couldn't possibly let her die now. After all that she had done for his people?

I squeezed her hand tightly, kissing the top of her head and hugged her tightly to myself. I almost waited for a response, a tugging of hair, her stroking my arm, but nothing happened.

"Please don't die," I whispered through tears. I hadn't even realized that I had started crying, but now the sobs cursed through me, with a sadness deeper than I had ever imagined possible.

I don't know how long I sat like that, just holding her body close to me, trying to save the last of her body warmth. But by the time the sun had gone down she was cold and I realized that my siblings would be looking for me.

I lifted her with ease and slowly made my way out of the forest, promising that I would get revenge on Miraz.

* * *

 _Peter_

I watched Edmund silently, as I leaned up against the wall. He was sitting on the bench in front of the door leading into the infirmary, his head in his hands. He wasn't crying and to be honest, I hadn't seen him cry at all. But his face had been tear stained as he walked through the gates of the Telmarine castle, Analise in his arms. We had all known by first glance what had happened.

I had tried comforting him – we all had, but he had shrugged it all off, turning into the Edmund we had all known before Narnia. Introverted, quiet, with harsh comments. We understood that he wanted to be left alone, but I also felt bad for not sitting next to him right now.

The door to the infirmary opened and Edmund jumped to his feet, clinging onto every last hope. Lucy stepped out of the infirmary, her now completely empty glass vile, clenched in her fist. They exchanged a few words and Edmund nodded solemnly. Lucy stepped forward, embracing him, her shoulders shaking with sobs. He didn't hesitate and immediately hugged her tightly, comforting her by stroking her hair.

I felt my heart drop in my stomach and realised that even I had been hoping for a miracle. I hadn't been very fair or "magnificent" towards Analise at all, and I had been hoping to make it up to her. Edmund walked into the infirmary, leaving Lucy behind – he would have to say good bye now.

"Lu," I walked over to her, placing my hand on her shoulder to get her attention. She sunk into me like the little girl she was and I let her cry on my shoulder.

"You were so unfair, Peter," she took a shaky breath and looked me in the eyes.

"I know," I rubbed her shoulder gently, feeling guiltier than ever. "I know."

"I think you should say sorry."

I nodded, knowing what she meant. It was too late to say sorry to Analise, but I definitely owed Edmund an apology. God, I had been such a jerk, which was nothing like me… mostly. If people bothered me, I wasn't good at hiding it and I had been let down by untrustworthy people too many times in my life. Analise had just seemed too perfect… with her blonde locks and stormy, blue eyes, charming smile and her sudden helping of my little brother and switching sides.

And now she was gone.

Every time a person died it took me a while to comprehend. It was different to each individual, but for me it always took me a few days, maybe even weeks, before sadness hit me like a tsunami wave and I would have to pull myself back from society for a few days just to understand that a life had gone lost.

For example in the Golden Age. I had had a young maid to help me around Cair Paravel, which was very unusual. Women were usually at home or were royal, there was almost no in between. But this young woman, her name had been Everly, was different. She was more intelligent than any male politician I had ever meant, more graceful than any queen (except maybe Susan. She was hard to overdo) and at the same time, incredibly beautiful and humble. I would be lying if I said that I hadn't felt mild affection towards her and her cunning wits. She had a humour, that I had never experienced before and she always had the ability to make me smile.

Tragically, she had drowned. No one ever found out how or why, but her body had been found in Lake Juniper, miles from Cair Paravel. She had told me days before that she would go to visit her family – she never even got there.

I remembered the day when Mr Tumnus told me the news. I had been chocked, but it had taken me wondering at least two weeks before it really sunk in. In this time I had thought at least five times why on earth she hadn't returned from her trip and every time I had to remind myself that she was dead.

It had also taken me three weeks and her dying, for me to realize that I had been in love with her.

Thinking about it, she reminded me a lot of Analise, at least look wise. Everly had had blonde hair, as well, a little darker and unrulier, but not much different. Also she had had a constant determination behind those baby blue eyes. Aslan, so much had changed since then.

It gave me another twist of guilt in my heart. Maybe that was another reason why my subconscious didn't like Analise: I had been jealous that Edmund got to spend more time with his beloved.

Now, I just wanted to smack myself in the face for being so selfish.

I carefully let go of Lucy, sending her a reassuring smile. She let out another shaky breath, as I kissed her forehead.

"I'll never let anything happen to you," I promised. It was a weak promise, but it calmed her down a bit. In the whirlwind of everything that had happened, I had completely forgotten to ask her how she was. She must've been so scared. "I'm sorry that I haven't had you as my first priority," I said quietly, referring to all three of my siblings.

She hugged me again and I took that as her accepting my apology. I wondered if Edmund would be as easy.

I rose to my feet and made my way over to the wooden doors leading into the infirmary. Not knowing what to expect, I opened the doors carefully, trying to come across as calm and collected as possible. As soon as I saw the scene before me, my shoulders slumped. There was no reason for me to be _calm and collected._ Only furious at Miraz and his men. For breaking these young hearts, these young people – Edmund didn't deserve this at all.

He was crouched over one of the many dull mattresses we had managed to get down here. Sitting on his knees, his thumb was tracing patterns into her pale skin. I noted that her face had lost that impeccable glow that she had always had. She was matte and white, her veins showing through her almost transparent skin. The wound on her chest had been wrapped in bandages, although it wasn't much use. All it did was make sure that her blood didn't flood the ground.

"Ed," I said, quietly. I don't know why I was being quiet. It seemed right.

He didn't even look at me, but his eyes flinched. He knew I was there. I sat down next to him, leaning up against the cold wall behind me. My eyes wandered up to the roof. This must have been a ball room, for a great chandelier hung from above and the walls were covered in the paintings of delicate rose petals. But the colour was fading, the paint was chipping off and the minimal furniture was covered in dust – this place hadn't been used in a long time.

"I'm sorry," I muttered. A lump started forming in my throat. "Aslan, Edmund, I'm so, so sorry."

He didn't reply, but his breathing had changed and I knew he was listening. The room was almost empty anyway, so it was pretty hard to block me out.

"I just… wanted you to be safe. And there was so much going on and then she came into the picture, and it just seemed so _untrustworthy_. I always wanted the best for you, you know that –"

I realized that I was pushing the fault on Analise and everyone else around me.

"Everything I did was wrong. I was a bad king, a bad role model, but most of all a bad brother. I was the one who wasn't trustworthy, I made stupid, wrong decisions which led to stupid consequences… and I was too scared to admit my mistakes."

Finally he turned to look at me and I was chocked to see how much he had changed from when we left from Finchley. His eyes were darker than ever and the shadows underneath his eyes seemed to stretch out over his entire face, deepening any wrinkle or imperfection, making him look five years older. His lips were dry and chapped and he had a purple bruise on his left cheek, which I hadn't even really noticed until now. How had I not noticed that?

"Will you forgive me?" I asked quietly.

He hesitated and for a horrible second, I thought he would say no. But then he slowly nodded his head and despite the situation, I breathed out in relief.

"Thank you," I said.

"Your welcome."

And so we sat there in silence, until I felt Edmund's head fall onto my shoulder. I glanced at him and realized that he had fallen asleep, which really didn't surprise me. I couldn't remember the last night any of us had gotten a good night's sleep.

It calmed me to hear his heart beat in the silence of the night. The sun had gone down and I knew, that know the Narnians would celebrate. The celebration would probably go on for weeks, maybe even months, and I, as High King would have to be present. So would the rest of my siblings, but maybe I could figure out a way to miss out on the first few days.

The Narnians always celebrated when they won a battle. Usually, I would celebrate with them, but this time I was in that minor group, that always sat on the outside of the dance floor and never once smiled or laughed or danced. These were the families, the closest friends of the soldiers that had given their life in the battles. To be honest, landing in that group had always been a fear of mine, because it would mean that I had lost someone very dear to my heart. I had never felt guiltier, than in that moment, when I thought _Thank God it wasn't one of my siblings._ I glanced at Edmund, to see if he had maybe in some way heard my thoughts, for then my apology wouldn't be worth much.

My eyes wandered back to Analise's body. It would have to be gone by morning. We couldn't wake up to a corpse and what did we want to do with it anyway?

I slowly edged away from Edmund, laying him down on the ground. It didn't look particularly comfortable, so I put a pillow under his head and a blanket on top of him. Then I crouched down next to Analise and took her hand in mine. It was cold, which wasn't a surprise, but I was still baffled by how cold a human body could be.

I squeezed it, once, twice and then whispered an apology, as sincere as I could master. She was so young and now she looked even younger. Broken and battered by life, she almost looked peaceful. Like she was asleep.

I stood up and looked at the two. They were _both_ just children and in a way, I regretted bringing Edmund to Narnia ever. I remembered the first time we were here, when I asked them to leave and go home. They had all refused, but what would they say if they saw themselves now?

We hadn't lost all too many lives, but darkness was so much more consuming this time around. Now I understood why they called it the _Golden_ Age. In comparison to now, those small enemies and tasks were incredibly easy.

I didn't want to stay here for the night, but I also didn't want to leave Edmund alone and so I pulled over an armchair and tried to find the most comfortable decision. From now on, my siblings would have to be my first priority.

 **A/N Okay, okay. I get it. I am REALLY not following the plot, BUT I'm hoping to change that up a bit by next chapter and hopefully also make it a biiiit less dark. Darkness really is consuming, Peter, it's definitely consuming my story. I wasn't expecting this to turn into something** _ **this**_ **heart breaking, I am truly sorry. I really want to wake her up and have them live happily ever after… but you'll have to read the next chapter to find out, sorry** **hehehe**

 **See you all**


	18. Chapter 18

_Edmund_

"I want to see him."

"Ed, do you really think -?"

My glare shut him up and Peter stepped aside. "Fine. But no maiming or mangling, and _no death._ "

I nodded absentmindedly and unlocked the door.

Miraz sat on the only, uncomfortable bench that there was in the cell. His hands were chained and he was shivering with cold, but I didn't feel sorry for him. Now he knew what it felt like.

"Hello, young King."

I didn't reply, but closed the door behind me and leaned against the stone wall.

Miraz chuckled wistfully. "What are you going to do, Edmund? Are you going to kill me? Torture me?"

"No."

I paused, because despite me having given much thought to torturing and killing, I didn't want to end up like him.

Miraz looked at me with his gloomy eyes. I wondered if he was haunted by the things he had done, but I doubted it.

"I'm going to leave you here, until you wither away and rot."

He nodded, raising his eyebrows. "Well, it's not ideal, but I tried my best. Maybe death would be the best thing now."

I ignored him. He was trying to talk himself out of it, but I wasn't fooled that easily. "I was thinking that I'd be extra kind to you."

"Why, thank you."

I wanted to punch him in the face, but I knew that Peter was standing right outside the door, listening intently to every word we said.

"So… why have you come to see me?" he asked.

To be honest, I had no idea why I had come to see him. I wanted to avenge Analise, but how would I do that, without hurting him physically? Apparently he had no dedications whatsoever, and loved no one, except himself.

"What were you planning on doing after killing your daughter?"

Miraz rolled his eyes. "We're doing Question and Answer now?"

"Yes. We are."

"After killing Analise, I…" he faltered. "I was going to die myself, wasn't I?"

"So, what was the point of killing her?"

"What do you _think,_ King Edmund?"

I looked at him, a little confused. "Revenge?"

"Exactly."

"On who? On me?"

"She humiliated me, Edmund. A King cannot be humiliated by his own daughter, his people won't even take him seriously anymore. You know how hard it is to take a whole army to war against their own princess? It was best this way."

I didn't reply at first, too confused by how a human could be this way.

"Don't look at me like that. It's not my fault –"

"Shut up."

It was ridiculously cold in the cell and now the cold seemed to be creeping up my legs and torso, icing around my heart. Seeing Miraz, so pleased with himself, recalled Analise's head on my shoulder, her quiet voice when she sang, her intelligent eyes and fierceness when she wanted to. It made me think of the first time I saw her, through blurred vision, as she came running in the room and tried to help me.

"You're sick," I muttered, not knowing what to say.

"No, Edmund. I'm just trying to go down in history," he smiled at me and I wanted to kill him as badly as ever.

* * *

"How did it go?"

"Great."

"What did he say?"

"Nothing."

"How do you feel?"

"Nauseous."

I walked past Peter, not wanting to answer his questions right now. I was fuming and disgusted and so, so sad. I hadn't wanted to accept it – a King wasn't supposed to be influenced by his feelings, but that's what I was. I felt like every happiness I had ever felt in the world, had been snatched from me and replaced by a dark hole. It felt like someone had taken a shovel and dug a hole in the pit of my stomach and it was the worst feeling ever.

"Ed –"

"I'm going to go for a ride," I said, not knowing how else to get rid of him. Still, I put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and smile on my face and said, "I'm sorry. I'm okay."

"You want me to come with you?"

"No thanks."

"Be back by nightfall."

"Yes, mom."

Peter didn't reply, but I knew that he was happy to hear my sarcastic humour was back. I grimaced, as soon as he was out of sight and bolted up the stairs, wanting to get out of that stupid cellar as quickly as possible.

I ordered for my horse to be saddled, while I walked into the kitchen to grab some food, in case I was out for the rest of the day, which was likely. Sadness hadn't made me stupid, only blind to the good things.

As soon as I mounted Rain, it felt right. I knew how much Analise had loved this stallion. Twice, I had walked in on her, talking softly to the silver horse and singing songs to it. No other horse received as much love and care from her as this one – Rain was one of the few horses that made it out of the war safely, and I knew that Analise would be relieved to hear that.

We trotted out of the Telmarine castle and I spurred it to gallop, as soon as we reached Queen's Road, the road leading into the forest. It felt nice to have the wind in my hair and the freedom, of feeling like you could do anything again and for a split second, I was able to drown out everything that had happened.

When it all came rushing back to me, I slowed Rain to a stop, leaned forward and sobbed.

 _What have you done?_

* * *

I was back at the castle in time for the dinner that was prepared every night. For once, since arriving here, we were treated like royals again and I hated it. I plopped down on my seat next to Lucy and put a couple of things on my plate, just to please my siblings.

After dinner, I sat down outside, in the garden where I had been only weeks before, while I was still the prisoner here. Again I was reminded by Analise – she was everywhere, especially in this castle and in my head.

I was so deep in thought that I flinched when I heard Aslan's calm voice behind me. "Hello, Edmund."

I didn't turn around. To be honest, I was kind of angry with him too – if he had the control over everything, he could've stopped this from happening. Couldn't he?

"Hello," I muttered.

"You're mad at me?" the lion stepped up next to me and it seemed, that in the last light of the day, he was shining with his familiar aura of kindness and fairness. I looked away.

"I'm mad at everyone."

He settled next to me. "I understand that."

"No, you don't. You didn't know her like I did."

Aslan nodded. "That is true. But I know you."

We were silent for a moment and I had the time to consider, that Aslan normally never came without warning. It was always a grand entrance he made – after a battle or at a ceremony or something like that. I had never experienced him literally coming out of the dark and just talking to me. The sun had gone down and I had inspected every detail of the Chocolate Cosmos, by the time I had scraped up enough bravery to ask what I had been wanting to ask.

"Why did you let it happen? If you can see how much this hurts me… how much it hurts everyone. You gave Miraz the pleasure of killing his own daughter – I don't see why you didn't do something."

"Everything happens for a reason," he said, and I couldn't help but get aggravatingly annoyed.

"Not _this!_ "

Aslan didn't respond at first and I could feel my heart beating faster. "Edmund, I can't save everyone. I hope you know that."

I wanted to tell him that he should have prioritized, but it would sound cruel.

"I have so much power and I did try to warn Analise, but I admit that I was a few moments too late. Who do _you_ blame, Edmund?"

I looked at the ground, feeling stupid. "Myself. If I hadn't snapped at her…"

"She would've still gone off. Analise was her own person and she made her own decisions and the sooner that you accept that no one could have helped her, the better. Don't ruin yourlife, by regretting things you have done in the past."

"If those regrets are me killing someone –"

"You didn't do anything, Edmund. You are one of the bravest young men out there and you should know that. Everyone makes mistakes."

"This isn't just a _mistake_ ," I grumbled.

"Yes, it was. A fatal one."

I didn't respond. What could I possibly say? He said that it wasn't my fault at all – then why did I still feel so guilty?

"I loved her."

"I know."

"And I didn't say I enough. I should've said it every day," I bit my lip and leaned against the wall behind me. It was completely dark now. The cicadas had started making their loud, drilling noise. "Do you think she knew, Aslan? How much I loved her. I don't even think I knew."

"She knew, Edmund. No one had ever cared so purely and genuinely for her and she knew."

I wanted to cry again, but I was empty of tears. Still, I had to fight back some hollow, dry sobs, that did nothing to make me feel better, only make my throat and chest ache.

"I can't even avenge her."

"You already have."

I snorted. "Why doing what? Winning the war?"

"No," he said, wistfully. "By letting her parents live."

I looked at him, confused. "Her mother didn't do anything wrong."

"The silent observers are often the biggest sinners," he said. "And you haven't killed her father, either."

"I am. Slowly," I pointed out.

Aslan sighed. "I will leave you to your thoughts."

He began walking away and I felt like I was letting go of something. Like Analise was leaving with him.

My shoulders relaxed, I closed my eyes, leaned my head back and the tears came rolling, silently.

 **A/N I am truly a monster. This will be the last chapter in the Narnia universe, but I'm going to write some back in Finchley... ;););););););););)**

 **okay. u better keep reading HUH**


	19. Chapter 19

_Silver eyes,_

 _Hoping for paradise_

 _I've seen it a million times_

 _Cry_

 _\- The Neighbourhood, Silver_

 _Edmund_

Being back in Finchley simply didn't make _sense._ Narnia had always been an escape for me, but I had never thought of it as weird… except maybe the exact moment I entered it. But even in that moment, all I could think about was how I could tell this to my friends back home and how I could taunt Susan and Peter with the fact that they hadn't gone. Sometimes I shuddered at the thought of being who I used to be and I absolutely despised it when little snippets came back up in my personality, now and again.

Strangely enough, for once, Finchley was the escape. It was like, once I wasn't in Narnia anymore, almost nothing reminded me of Analise. I was leaving behind my life as a king for now and so I also had to leave behind his problems. There was no pain anymore, just an empty space where she used to be. She still was there, just in a different way. Every time I felt it, I thought of my last personal conversation with Aslan and somehow I knew that her place would be filled. It sounded horrendous, but anything was better than walking around feeling like half of me was missing for the rest of my life. I even held my eye open, but no one could compare. Besides it would be cruel to get together with a girl, just to fill the empty space that the previous one left. That wasn't me anymore.

In a way I thought that it was impossible to compare anyone to Analise. No one was as intelligent, as intellectual, as interesting. I wasn't stupid and I noticed the way some girls looked at me – Jane had even told me that I looked _good_ one day. I had thanked her awkwardly, said "you too" even awkwardlier, blushed and walked away as fast as possible.

When around girls I always turned into this complete moron. Peter was the exact opposite – he was charming, funny and could wrap girls around his finger. Not that he wanted to. Analise helped me at my most vulnerable and helpless state – if she hadn't I probably wouldn't even be alive right now. After that there was no point in getting weird around her, because she had almost already seen every negative side to me in that chamber. It was like the walls had sucked every hope, humour and fight out of me, but still she respected me afterwards. No girl could compare to her, but maybe I could meet someone, whom I didn't have to compare, because she was special in her own way.

I wanted to punch myself for moving on so quickly. I just wanted to get my mind off it – it wasn't helping to just _think_ about her kiss all day. In fact, it was the definition of torture and I saw no point in that.

I thought of the things my mother had told me, when I was young, innocent and yes, even remotely sweet once a year. Despite my protests she would tell me and Lucy love stories and how my father and she met. With all the blur going on around me, I sometimes forgot I even had parents. I didn't know if I should blame me or them.

She had told me once that you only fall in love once. Sitting there, staring out at the rain drops hammering against the windows, in my English class in Finchley, I remembered the day as vividly as ever.

 _It had rained for so long. A week of endless water pouring out of the sky. Lucy was propped up on one elbow, her hand frozen in the midst of turning a page in her picture book. Even I, little 7 year old Edmund, who was a complete pest 90% of the time, had quieted down and was sitting and listening intently to my mother's story._

 _As she finished, Lucy clapped her hands together, excited. "That's amazing, mommy. Do you think I'll ever fall in love like that?"_

" _Of course you will, sweetheart."_

 _Lucy looked at her mom for a second, quiet. "But I'll never be as beautiful as you, will I?" her voice was even squeakier than normal as she said it and I almost felt sorry for her. Girls had so much to worry about in their future._

 _Mom patted her lap and Lucy's small feet made tapping noises on the hard wood floor as she scuttled over there._

" _I believe that you will, my dear," mother smiled and stroked her daughter's chestnut braid. "But even if you don't, it doesn't matter. For you will find a boy who loves you for who you are in here," she pointed to Lucy's heart and then poked her finger into Lu's stomach, making her giggle._

" _How would you describe your love to papa, mommy?"_

 _Mother didn't say anything for a while, pondering on the thought. I could almost see her tasting, evaluating every word in her mouth before trying the next._

" _Tender?" Lucy asked and I knew that it was a word she had just learned in school. She had walked around all day yesterday, calling everything 'tender'. Tender fireplace, "Oh, look, Ed, what a tender girl!", tender colouring books. This was the first time that she used the word correctly, but my mother shook her head._

" _Tender would be the last word that I would use. No, it was crazy. Wild and all over the place. I got nothing done because all I wanted to do was be with your father," she smiled at the memory, I gagged and Lucy giggled._

It took me so many years to realize how much my mother had been right that day. The gaping hole in my chest wasn't just longing, it was an ocean. Strong waves and tides, trying to bring her back to me with no success. She had been swallowed by the abyss of current and power, been pulled under so often, until even she, had to give up.

She wouldn't want me to miss her. I could almost hear her voice in my ear, telling me to live my life. "Stop thinking about me, Edmund, please. Don't forget me, don't let go of my memory… just accept that it's only a memory now."

I wanted to be angry, but at who? Miraz was rotting in a cell somewhere. All his soldiers were dead or had been sent to the mortal world. I was angry with myself, angrier than ever before, but to what use?

I looked out of the window of our small house, at the dim colours of the streets outside and wanted to scream. The scent of mom's cooking rose up from the kitchen and I heard Lucy giggle uncontrollably and Susan letting out a high pitched scream, followed closely by a loud snort from Peter and then laughing from them all. They had moved on so quickly, it was insane. Not necessarily moved on, but their thoughts weren't lingering in the other world as much.

I got up and took a deep breath, trying to pull myself together. Analise was gone. Narnia was gone, even if only temporarily. This was all I had and all I was ever going to have. I turned and walked down the stairs to the kitchen, opening the door slightly, before mentally giving myself a push, smiling and walking in.

I just had to learn. To forgive, to love and to experience. There was so much I had to learn.

 **A/N: That's it! I'm sorry, I know I kind of promised that there would be more to the story but I like this ending… If you like my writing though, I'm planning on doing more Edmund/OC very soon and it's going to be gooood! ;)**

 **Love**


End file.
